Yours truly;

The smallest things can take up the largest space.

2011-02-21T05:11:00.000-08:00

I'm happy I completed these few things today ;

I had sufficient hours of sleep before going off to school for final exam.
Answered & filled up my 20 marks essay question with over 600 words.
Feeling accomplished because I know I did my best. (Whatever the result is, I hope its good :/)
Offered to help my uncle water the plants(At the house entrance. I felt like I just saved lives.)
Sat in front of the TV, watched every shows aired on E Channel.
Reblogged too many interesting and pretty stuffs from Tumblr, caught up with what I've missed on Bloglovin. (without having to worry about a thing.)
Exchanging follow-up texts with Sufi. (frequent teasing = passports to make my day)
Religiously applying my facial skin care regime for the past 2 days. (I'm not that consistent when it comes to these things.)
Followed by my new favourite lotion, Vaseline healthy white lotion. (I think i've already smeared this on about 3 times today, only? Come on, its an addiction!)
Updating my blog. (always been a pleasure)

Its true when they say tiny gestures can mean the most to someone who's willing to receive it. Well, I'm one of them.

Touche

2011-02-19T05:04:00.000-08:00

“Once I began a book, I couldn’t put it down. It was like an addiction; I read while I ate, on the train, in bed until late at night, in school, where I’d keep the book hidden so I could read during class. But I had almost no desire to talk with anyone about the experience I gained through books and music. I felt happy just being me and no one else.”

—	Haruki Murakami & I can never go wrong.

I have nothing, if I dont have you.

2011-02-17T03:42:00.000-08:00

I love bloggers who have the tendency to update their blog(preferably daily) more frequent than I do, because I dont. lol. Sure I repeat this a thousand times, but I really, personally love reading blogs, because these are the mediums that inspires. I envy perfect lives, wealth, fashion, beauty, but I'll get back to my usual state once Im done gushing about others, which is good, because I know my grounds. Of course there are days I wish these bloggers could talk lesser or more, but all in all, they are so good at expressing themselves. Can you already sense the jealousy in me?

Another thing is, there is certainly something isnt right about my eye-sight these days, poor and blurrish vision is taking over me. Squinting aint cool & I'm not used to donning my geeky black glasses everywhere I go. Guess I have to endure then.

Alright then, back to revising. 1 & a half hour UT tomorrow. I CAN DO THIS!

Song of the day ; I have nothing - Whitney Houston (Jessie J cover).

Feels good.

2011-02-15T16:34:00.000-08:00

I started on a good note today. Wasn't late to send Dad off, I got my usual morning texts from the Boy(its always fun to read), Mum called to say she felt better & I shamelessly admitted I prayed for her well-being during prayers last night(thereafter, I thanked Allah & was smiling all to myself ever since), Uncle bought me porridge(too spicy though) and best of all, I woke up early! I mean look at the time, its only 8:34 am! Usually around this time, I would force my legs to rush up the elevator to catch the train. Not today though, exam starts at 2, so I still have some time to SWOT(look, a new word! LOL). I feel a lack of proportion though, I have yet to iron my clothes (never too prissy about what I wear anyway. tsk!), packed my bags, wash my hair .. see, these are the mandatory everyday stuffs I need to fulfill before I feel wholly complete. Sounds a little too much, I think so too.

Okay now I'm feeling sleepy. Whattheheck. Porridge, I blame you! I feel sleepy every time I'm done eating, WHYYYYYY? ):

Am I back?

2011-02-15T06:12:00.000-08:00

The urge to blog has haunt me for a few days now. Truth to be told, I kinda miss blogging and expressing my thoughts (even at the tiniest issues). Most probably, the main possible reason to this entry is - I'm at my wits end, trying and working hard to portray my sentiment to those who read, and at the same time perfecting my English (ridiculous thinking there). Seriously, if only i could swiftly convey my thoughts to english words, i'd call myself a genius. I'm nowhere near there of course. Sigh.

Now that aside, I'm suppose to be studying, memorizing, revising, whatever you call it .. but here I am squirming in my seat, blogging. Albeit the fact that I am suppose to get myself ready for exam tomorrow, I'm here spending a wee bit of my time to satisfy my urge. These are the things I'd do to keep the peace in my mind - which includes sacrificing my precious time.

I promised myself this would be a short one. Im in a huff, im annoyed.. is this what coffee does to you? I thought I was suppose to feel the caffeine-rush/excitement? I reckon myself having a hard time sleeping tonight. Oh damn, I just dumped myself in hell.

2010-11-07T05:21:00.001-08:00

Your voice.

I think Day 1 went fine, i didnt mourn that much like i predicted i would. just got off the phone with Sufi. minus the fact that each min could cost up to $1, i'd prefer to ignore the latter. besides, a good night talk is all i need, right now. i hope the next 20 days will be just as good, maybe even better.

The weather is totally acceptable, by me. Singapore feels and look good with this kind of weather. not to mention i'd rather be in bed than completing my 2 sets of notes, i have to believe sometimes sleep deprivation can do good. so ill keep myself discipline for next few hours. cept' if only this swivel chair im seating on can be a lil more comfy. grr.

School tomorrow. the usual routine continues. ive saved some sleeping time by preparing earlier; got my clothes ironed (i wish i had perfect-fit boots to go with what i'll be wearing tmr), and my bag packed (i've decided to make full use of the variety of bags i bought on impulse and got chunked aside, feels like ive wasted dollars buying them, so this is the only way to make me feel better).

Im contemplating - should i get to sleep or keep on revising? didnt i just mention i would keep myself disciplined?

i should.

night-dreaming?

2010-11-06T02:30:00.000-07:00

I have finally decided to start blogging again. maybe not daily, but .. we'll see.

So its barely Day 1 Sufi left for Australia for army training, and i am already this restless. when i say this, i meant major. but i shall seek positivity because, he's gonna do well, im sure he will. he always does.

The urge to blog these days are highly never there. i'd probably say this a thousand times, but inspirations doesnt come easy. or it does, only when you're day/(night?) dreaming or just by looking at the people around you, or maybe further. so im here back again because the blog follow-ups are just that inspiring that i have to sit down and do something about it. welcome me back. lol. but just an advanced gentle reminder, updates can be real still cos i might be too caught up with school(that's one extremely lame reason) and usually too cooped in my own world(which is bad because i think unnecessarily and mostly at war withmyself).

On the contrary (to my sad intro) .. its a rainy night! what could be better than a good weather? maybe a comfy hug from the one you love, of course, not a question to be asked. see, im contradicting, now & always-.-

I shall burn the midnight oil tonight, no maybe tomorrow. its time to cuddle in bed. this should be nice. goodnight all(:

Current song : Long distance - Bruno Mars. (Fits perfectly!)

come back soon, dearest one.

His Love.

2010-08-22T07:02:00.000-07:00

Seriously, how adorable?

Haha. he seems to have thought alot about what to do this weekend. he came up with this as a suggestion but sadly, it'll not be a nice scene to be going around everywhere with painted nails during the Ramadhan. not that i paint my nails alot, but i just think its inappropriate. i had to politely decline his offer and come up with something else. highest possibility = ice skating/karaoke-ing. haha. i love to sing despite not having the voice of an angel. i wish!

& something to make up for my miserable night.

He tagged me in one of his post status and i accidentally removed it! aaarghhhh! i find ways to get it fixed but to no avail. totally mad at myself so i decided to send him a new post. im terribly sorry Dear. super sorry. and do take care of yourself in the err 'forest' aye? iloveyou.

Fighting!

2010-08-17T06:34:00.000-07:00

HEY'ALL!

So let me see. its hard to admit, but im doing it anyways, so since the start of the holidays, ive been a miserable impoverish girl cos mum's not granting me any allowance until school starts which is a major 'UGH'. wait! i think i need to acknowledge everyone the presence/existence of Baking Life in my life now. haha, yeah thanks to my classmates who 'psycho-ed' me to start a virtual bakery. im so gonna miss you guys, E54N. havent had such a great bond for a semester, ever! ): ohh, my moment of agony.

Oh yes, so back to my pathetic school break. ive been religiously devoting my time in the mosque. repeat after me ; 'wvaah wvaah wvaah'. YES! helping out my neighbour and taking the time off to 'buat amalan yang baik di bulan yang mulia ini'. cheywaaah. im doing good, earning some money at the same time. SO. ITS. GOOD. AND. I. SHALL. NOT. COMPLAIN. AS. IF. IM. UNEMPLOYED.

On a lighter note, i can feel my tummy getting flatter! i dont know if its just me or IT IS ME?! but i do know, fasting and fatigue results to a harmonious sync. why? becos when youre feeling tired to wake up for breakfast, you'll fill your tummy with the lightest food you could reach just to get back to sleep, then when youre awake, you have no choice but to NOT eat cos youre fasting. either way round, you'll feel the guilt if you break the rule. (: so, my aim for this joyous month is to lose as much fats as possible. i hope it'll work.

In the mean time, im waiting for Sufi's call. such a pity. they had to 'run' after terawih. i dont really understand the term 'run' in their context but i hope he'll do well. like the Koreans qoute "fighting!", i shall slip in a good one and here goes, "FIGHTING, BABY!" or "BABY, FIGHTING!". i have no idea which is right. and i just sounded like a noob but whatever. HEHE!

and here's one for You.

2010-08-11T18:37:00.001-07:00

& he makes me smile (:

short.

2010-08-04T22:35:00.000-07:00

beautiful, beautiful, description of love. first love. very much related to mine(well except the last part, we're still very much in love), and im sure most of you. so click here to access.

currently reading these 2 books..

to destress myself. have been so caught up with too many unnecessary things. cant stop wondering when will be the day i would finally take the plunge to end certain issues. im mentally-tired (if there's such a word/phrase). somehow, blasting off all genre songs seems to work at times like this. ill get over things easy, so yeah .. Thank God.

guess what i cook for break-fast today?

BLACK PEPPER CRAB!

hehe okay im done! feeling a lil too dizzy, i need to get to bed.

toodles!

i still have a life.

2010-08-02T05:24:00.000-07:00

i feel light-headed. my throat invites some sort of vomit-y feeling. all i need is a warm tight hug from the Boy. nothing measures up to the comfort he provides. but we do understand, national service commitments are beyond our control, and im kinda use to it, despite getting all cranky and whiny, i spare him the exaggerating details of my one-day-disease. im sure at the end of the week, we'll rekindle. dont get me wrong, we're not in some kind of argument(its been awhile since we last had one anyways), except being 'apart' kinda makes me feel .. distant. im here at home and he's there in camp. but fret not, he always took the liberty to remind me the importance of keeping the days as occupied as possible, with plusses to keep the calls and texts coming in. then i stopped to realise how grateful i am to have someone thinking of me too despite his busy schedule. i feel blessed, and i should just kept on going with my thoughts in his safe hands.

i miss reading novels. ive since returned my two borrowed books and have yet to look for new ones. one of the steps to keep myself occupied and also helped me to get rid of worthless thoughts.

next, ive been keeping up with the comedy series How I Met Your Mother. special gratitude to my classmate who was generous enough to share with me her collections. if in any case im outdated cos the show has been premiering for awhile, please do not underestimate. im just a tad slow from the rest aye(: but im sure getting alot of giggles from these episodes. very enlightening.

i havent been checking up with the FM's these days. since the dismissal of AM Jam by Ms Ven and Mr Yang, im kinda losing interest with the morning mayhem they used to came up with. trust me, i used to smile all to myself in the bus cos they can get that hilarious. now at the same time due to my diminishing curiousity, im losing the daily feeds and latest tunes. but if not for BlogLovin, i'd be lost completely. and the array of international blogs are keeping me inspired as well.

Your mind is working at its best when you’re being paranoid.

You explore every avenue and possibility of your situation

at high speed with total clarity.

-Banksy

i found this from Tumblr. tell me how far do you agree with this. if you ask me, i am agreeing to this with no extent at all. my mind works best when im paranoid, i can think of everything beyond anything. i would say 'fuck yeah' to this one, no doubt!

something just pisses me off. again, i shall take my leave. goodnight everyone.

truth.

2010-07-29T20:58:00.000-07:00

"Does it break my heart, of course, every moment of every day, into more pieces than my heart was made of, I never thought of myself as quiet, much less silent, I never thought about things at all, everything changed, the distance that wedged itself between me and my happiness wasn’t the world, it wasn’t the bombs and burning buildings, it was me, my thinking, my cancer of never letting go, is ignorance bliss, I don’t know, but it’s so painful to think, and tell me, what did thinking ever do for me, to what great place did thinking ever bring me? I think and think and think, I’ve thought myself out of happiness one million times, but never once into it."

Jonathan Safran-Foer; Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

Hello, again.

2010-07-28T04:10:00.000-07:00

I miss blogging. it took me so long to update, my apologies. i have nothing to blog about actually, really. if you're wondering, Sufi and I are doing extremely great. we turned 23rd month yesterday. wow we've made this far. everything just falls into place. hopefully the days to come will be as good.

Im listening to Paramore, at the moment. Airplanes to be specific, brilliant song. reminds me of Shape Run which was held last Saturday night and ends only on Sunday afternoon. a good experience indeed, minus the fact that im the only sore loser trying really hard to stay up the whole night. there's one more coming up this weekend. yes, again. cant wait! and something has been planned out, highest possibility it'll work out(still hoping).

Im having butterflies in my stomach, right this second and i have no idea why. the sugar rush feeling? ive not chewed one in 3 days! nevermind, lets just pass that.

so everyone knows how much i love Tumblr right. the best option to OPT for if you have nothing better to do. there's a number of pictures which could REALLY brighten up my day. so yes, you guessed it, thats what i do in times of boredom-help. what else .. let me see. i bloghop. gives me the inspirations. i have a few links in my list whereby i browse through them almost everyday. you see, i have nothing better to do besides struggling to finish up my slides, which come to think of, they are not as difficult like anyone could ever imagine doing for class assignment. sorry, im contradicting.

But i guess one thing that will definitely spoil my day is having to mind the number of texts i sent out. because apparently, Starhub fails to see the fun size student im in and so i am only eligible to 500 sms per month, which will never be enough for me(at least). so there you go, ill be stuck with this plan for about 2 more years. dammit.

I have with me 2 books, im done with Dead Is The New Black, and the other is well .. a malay novel, but its too long winded, i want stories that will get me straight to the point, pretty dislike suspense. but i love surprises. CONTRADICTING AGAIN.

Before things get a tad too random and starts to confuse you readers, i better take my leave. i do appreciate it if you spend a lil more of your time to watch this. you'll end by leaving my blog with a smile.

ATTENTION :

2010-07-20T04:27:00.000-07:00

POST WILL BE UPDATED TMR! STAY TUNE! :D SORRY FOR THE DELAY.

old dig ups.

2010-07-18T04:16:00.000-07:00

extremely outdated peektures.

appreciate.

2010-07-14T19:59:00.000-07:00

i am super full(ive come to a decision, to start being modest, and do not ever look down on KFC's Flaming Chilli hot devil drumlets, cos trust me they're extremely spicy, my lips burned. i am a strong nut, but i guess i have to give in sometimes.). i am having my period. my bottom is sore/achy, i have no idea why. i am seriously not in the mood for anything(now). i just wanna take a long nap. i want Baby's hug to relieve my pain. i want my girlfriends' laughter to perk me up.

but for now, ill just make do with whatever i have with me. simple things like..

Durian Pancake from Baby.
Goodie bags filled with lots of usable stuffs (pink bookmarks, pink pens, free samples..)
applying hair moisturiser (i am a faithful user for Sunsilk Pink)
trying to keep myself organized and prepared.
feeling satisfied after attending religious class(:
wearing my new geek specs.
tumblring.
looking forward to spending the weekend with Baby.
met up with my girls, eventho it lasted less than a few hours.
and finally, being thankful for everything i have now(:

look at the sky, what does it says?

POWER NAP!

high up in the sky..

2010-07-14T05:55:00.000-07:00

i didnt know...

hot tea could make me feel happy..

cuddles like this..

cute images..

colourful nails.

my favourite actress..

including my favourite boy's voice, no less.

SLIPPER

2010-07-14T04:24:00.000-07:00

tonight will be all about studying. but no guarantees cos i might just end up sleeping. seriously, where's my sense of urgency? priority has switched places with sleeping. im never sleep-deprived. never will. cos i can just sleep anytime. which reminds me of ..

extracted from Friendster. brings back wonderful memories. yes, icansleep anywhere anytime only IF im extremely sleepy. before, when Sufi & I first started 'dating', we love to take bus rides but i will end up sleeping. how boring can i get seriously? but really, i would. and he as usual, got a lil too generous with the 'shoulder sharing' for my sleep comfort. how nice ^^

but tonight, ive gotta try to sleep less. at least less-er. mum always warned me to not think of sleep all the time(cos i just do). Sufi calls me lazy(cos i will sleep after im done eating). Mai & Nard calls me the 'early sleeper'(cos i sleep before 12am and they dont). but what can i do? im born this way! okay, thats a lie. haha. i just like sleeping, i admit!

but first RJ.

question : If you are a sports fan of a particular sports team, relate how important the media is to you in terms of updating you about news of the team and the latest scores. If you are NOT a sports fan, relate if you feel that media plays an important role in delivering information today, or is it really just to sell "particular" messages that is done to evoke a reaction (i.e. purchasing) from you?

GO & DIE LA, SO HARDDDD.

back! part 1

2010-07-13T23:33:00.000-07:00

i have finally managed to reconstruct my blog. not much of a difference, but yeah, its pretty tough with all the html shites. trust me.

sorry ive been missing alot. i'll try to catch up with what i've missed. my life is boring. you have no idea how restless i am these days. nothing entice me to bring out the best in me. the chirpy side of me is possibly gone due to the monotonous routine im in.

i'll be back with more perky posts and pictures.

PROMISE!

however, i am active on Tumblr.

so do visit for more updates. (:

accomplished/-ing.

2010-07-04T04:48:00.000-07:00

loving the accomplishment, right now.

i did ;

RJ for CE talk. (1 point)
SHL tshirt design. (2 points)
Poster Design (prolly 2 points)
learnt crocheting/knitting. (kinda got addicted to it already)
rearranged apps.
download new songs.
prepared Fried Chickens for my family. (they loved it!)
went for Religious Class this morning. (met humai<3,>
had lunch with my lovely Boyfriend.

im about to do ;

CONTINUE KNITTING. (my new found interest)
study for Microecons. (Sociology UT was doable, Alhamdulillah.)
read Sports Business pre-readings.
pack my school bag.
iron out clothes. (no new clothes = boringgg)
tidy up my room.
wash up, and ..
SLEEP!

im feeling so good. what could be better than this. Thank you GOD.

ill never break your heart - Backstreet boys.

2010-06-27T06:09:00.000-07:00

My boyfriend gets a little too sweet whenever we have unnecessary issues going on.

Earlier today, me being the usual whiny erm ME, was complaining how i hungry i am. and i just wanna have KFC chickens. ONLY. nothing else. see, so stubborn. other than that, i would give it a pass. and so, he offered if i want him to buy some and bring it over. i tried to be nice and said if he thinks im not troubling him, then why not! and no, i never really yearn for him to send me food. he did it a couple of times of course, but im not that heartless to force him to travel all the way over just to send me food. haha. i can be sucha a dweeb at times.

Then awhile later, we had a little tiny mini argument. really unnecessary. but it was all started by me, i must admit. my selfish character aint diminishing anytime soon. i do need help i guess. alright. so the silly tiff kept on going until he told me to come down to get my KFC chickens(!) trust me, he was real mad previously, so i assumed he didnt wanna meet me at all. this boy is full of surprises, how can i ever forget that. so i rushed down the steps to see him holding on to a big packet of 2 piece chicken meal. i was only expecting 'snackers', really. he truly understands my love for chicken thighs and drumsticks. aww sweet!

Thank you HoneyBee for being such a sweetheart. <3

[editted]

OMG, ITS ALREADY THE 27TH?!

HAPPY 22ND SUFI HIZRIAN!

damn, how could i have forgotten? :/

[editted/]

How i first met Sufi Hizrian Part 1 [EDITTED]

2010-06-24T09:14:00.000-07:00

NOTE : this post could be a lil confusing/ too lengthy / too mushy. the decision is yours. either you stay or leave. bear with me, aye. (:

Frankly, i have been considering about posting this up for a long long time, now. i did admit about sharing this post, way way back. so here it is. its gonna be long. and yes, im still trying to improve on my language.

Im sure everyone has their own taste of first love. probably, first love is the most unforgettable feeling. that special sentiment only you could feel, and will never be able to be interpreted in words. i was in a state of delusion when he first caught my eye. never once have i thought i would end up with him, never once. i find him too perfect for a partner. my partner at least. but its apparent enough that im the lucky one who was able to capture his heart. he for sure, is the best thing i’ve ever had. never once have i regret his existence in my life, in me. everyone has their own love story, we have ours too. in my case - ‘i liked him at first, but dislike him the next ... but youll never know, love is unexpected.’

To tell you the truth, Sufi & I go waaay back. we started off as friends in Secondary School. he’s my senior and both of us studied in the same neighbourhood school. don’t believe me? see this..

just look! we have the same uniform!

okay no, i was definitely kidding. we weren’t from the same school. our schools, are located far far away from the other. i was from Yio Chu Kang Sec, and he’s from Punggol Sec. surprisingly, our school uniforms almost looked alike. and look at me. those were my ‘act cute times’, man. HAHA! oh i was a student councillor too, did you know? yes, a student councillor who always got caught for short skirt and ankle socks, by the DM Mr Rumi. (I WASNT A TYPICAL MINAH BTW, I USED TO BE A GEEK!) talking about Mr Rumi, i saw him earlier today on my way to school. still so small size, i think i bigger than him ah. he could recognise me from afar, he even waved(!). Mr Rumi will never get ‘my short skirt issues’. i just cant get it above my waist, because my waist line is too wide and i cant find any skirt suitable for my waist. i have no choice, Mr Rumi. HAHA!

OKAY STOP JOKING AROUND. back to reality.

year 2007 - i cant exactly remember the date. but i remember the day he first added me on ...

Yes Friendster! (God bless Friendster. FS used to be a big hit during those days.) i didnt know him then, neither did he. but before, accepting friend requests was like the norm. people tried hard to compete who has more friends. and so you guessed it. i accepted every request there was, even those i never knew in real life. as for me & Sufi, yes, we started off as perfect strangers. but of course, thanks to his FS photos, i found out that he was(and still is) Rizal's (my sec sch senior) friend in ITE College East. look, during that year, i was still in Sec 4. im about to sit for my O levels. never would i have thought, i would continue studying at the same school as him. in fact, the moment I stepped into CE, i didnt even remember Sufi was studying there too.

So back to my 'story', a few days upon accepted request, he sent me a message on FS itself - asking for my email add. okay, again, i was all about making friends those times aye. im sure all you readers had your fair share of such 'a lil too friendly' times too. okay wait, when i was viewing his profile for the first time, actually, i already find him cute. heh. no i mean really, among all the other friends i had on my list, he was pretty .. charming (of course i could only make that out through his pictures.) i like this pic of his. i find it 'cute'.

OKAY I KNOW, NO ONE COULD EVEN SEE HIS FACE ON THIS ONE, BUT SERIOUSLY, I HAVE NO IDEA HOW I FIND IT CUTE TOO -.-

Then i take a look at this one. i think he looked even cuter from the way he 'smile'.
(he rarely smile, im sure everyone knows that. but bila part Jesicca Alba ... ummmph! bukan main!) So yeah i ended up giving him my email add (which the same one still does exist up till now) and we chatted both online and on FS. i like the way he responds, every single time. very heart warming, i felt really comfortable chatting with him. but i havent 'liked' him just yet. i mean cmon, i used to believe 'online' dating never will work out. i was wrong. not for our case, though.

We then brought it to the next level. he asked for my phone number, which i willingly gave up. yeah wow. i know most of you might think 'that's fast'. uhhuh, i havta admit, it was fast. only a few chats and we exchanged numbers? but i cant help it. i find him too nice. i really felt comfortable with him. i know it sounds like 'im too easy' kinda thing. look guys, up till now, never once i regretted passing up my num. (:

(SIDETRACK : I FEEL SO MAT MAT MINAH MINAH TALKING ABOUT EXCHANGING NUMBERS. ZAMAN BILE OI ‘KASI KASI NOMBOR’?)

That night, he texted. i replied, but wasnt as much. the reason? let that be history. we 'went apart' for about a year .. until ..

Year 2008 - i was posted to ITE college east. at the same time i was taking my Private O (again). i wasnt interested in school during the first few weeks. i skipped alot. even so, through the days, i made lots of awesome friends. the clan is still the best tho, up till now. i was happy to have them around every day. but my heart just wasnt in school. furthermore, tragedy happens(again, this shall stay private. for those who knows, i appreciate your help during those tragic times.)

It totally rips off my mind that i was in the same school as Sufi. i cant exactly remember Sufi, even. there was once, i 'think' i saw him. i kinda recognise his face a lil. but never really got into it because we havent been contacting for more than a year.

Until one day. (26 august 2008, one day before my birthday). i attended school and received a text from Rizal that he was in school (year 2 Sports management students was on attachment, at that time) and i decided to meet him. so i went down, met him at the table outside Co-op(a shop which sells the cheapest plain water!). and Rizal came with this unrecognisable guy. i remembered ...

Rizal : tu Sufi. ( thats Sufi. )
Me : oh erm.. ( *looked at him and smiled )

My mind went 'Man, he's hot. besar or what sia dekni. how come he looked so different from pictures eh?'.
No, if you were me, look at this pic, wouldn’t you be confused and surprised? does this pic even resembles Sufi Hizrian? got same or not? you tell me.

But guess what, as soon as i looked at him, HE LOOKED AWAY! HE WASNT EVEN LOOKING AT ME. REALLY! OMG. he didnt sit with us. he didnt talk to us. since then i didnt 'like' him, right that moment! (so fast, i know) i dislike him, alot. i stereotyped a lot about him. i find him EXTREMELY arrogant.

Then ...

Came this pretty girl. also standing outside co-op. and Sufi was staring at her! (wa darah up woooh). yes, i mean stare STARE! he cant get his eyes off her la wahlauu. [okay okay ive yearned long enough to say this : ‘ye laaa, i ni siape kan, budak logistic wearing the same polo tee as the others, tak cantik, tak attractive.' HAHA! everytime i say this he’ll go .. ‘i tak tengok dia la! she was looking at me, so i look at her back la.’ that one means tak tengok meh? -.-!] and all those while, i was still looking at him. i dislike him more. i felt a tinge of jealousy in me. i have no idea why. but i was certain i dislike him. when its time to go, he walked off without even turning back. -.-!

Soon enough, i wasnt thinking about it, at all. i never thought i would be friends with him anyway.

The next day (27th august, my birthday). again i met Rizal at the stadium. this was coincidental. Year 2 SM students were having an event there, at the same time, i was there because my friends wants me to. but first, Rizal came over to me to wish me happy birthday. and you bet, Sufi was there too. yes he was, just sightly further way from us. and Rizal shouted...

'Sufi, niari Fini nye birthday tau. tak nak wish ke?'.

His response? he turned, gave me this arrogant look, and turned away. WAAAAAH! (bikin hati gua hottt only). i was extremely upset la of course! not that i want him to wish me or anything like that, but at least smile can? wahliewwww my birthday lehhh! but my adorable friends made the situation a whole lot better, they actually gave me a small surprise and sang a cute song created by them & them only! too sweet. i cried. heee.

Again, soon, i kinda forget whatever happened earlier on.

That night at 11 ++ pm, Sufi texted me 'happy birthday Fini!'. nice. uhmm nice. it was wholly unexpected. i was surprised. its been an uber longgggg time since he last texted. i never knew he still kept my number.

No wait, actually i was on the phone with Humai during that time, and this was what we talked about ..

Me : eh Sufi msg happy birthday?
Humai : lerr, Sufi mana pulak?
Me : yang dulu tu laa, i told you. da lama tak msg. niari msg pulak. sombong je.
Humai : oh yang tu. waah fini, sufi msg sehhh. (that used to be her fav line -.-)

SEEEEE! even humai cant remember him. its been awhile. a longgg while to be exact. but .. i cant help but reply him la hor. abe da capture my heart already then what to do. seriously cant help it. HAHAHA! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?! (side note : its 2 in the morning. its rare for me to stay up here with my Presario, updating my blog k. so my brain like sot sikit. ignore me.) yes, i replied him once and soon we began texting all night. i asked him how he knew it was my birthday (soalan bodoh). he answered, apart from what Rizal told him earlier, Zainul (his friend, which surprisingly happens to be my classmate) informed him about it. errm wow, who would have thought huh.

The next day, i searched the school for him. haha, okay not exactly search the whole school la, the school so big-.- but yes, i cant deny that i really did search for him but he was nowhere to be found. i then bravely decides to sent him a text, and i did. (first brave encounter). i waited eagerly for his reply but 15mins later, my phone receives no text message. i have this habit of switching off my phone whenever someone didnt reply to my texts. i did just that and within minutes, Zainul came up, passed his phone to me cos 'Sufi wanna talk to you'. err wow. i was speechless. i put the phone on my ear and could only murmur a soft 'hello'. he asked why i wasnt replying to him and why my phone wasn’t turned on when he called. he sound so MANLY. HAHA! im starting my nonsense again. no i mean really. you know some guys right, when they talk on the phone, their voices sounded different at the end of the line. and yeah, it was my first time hearing his voice too. so i was practically dumbfounded. i said i will text him in awhile, and so the texting goes on right after .. up till this very minute. he never once decides to stop texting me.. (:

end of Part 1. wait up for Part 2 aye.

2010-06-19T07:23:00.000-07:00

hey guys, i just created a Formspring (on the sidebar) for those who have any questions or comments. do drop a visit & just ask! (ps : this might just be temporary) thanks! :D

nyeaha!

2010-06-19T03:31:00.000-07:00

you know what, it annoys me that i didnt sign up for NDP this year. why? because my boyfriend's there(!), i can begin experiencing event management and I COULD FREAKING COLLECT MY CE POINTS THAT EASY! omg! what is wrong with me?! it aches me whenever i see a few of my friend's FB updates on NDP rehearsal. i missed out alot, this time. AND it sucks because the deadline was too soon and they are not recruiting anymore. dammit!

so as you can see, im stuck at home. trying to be productive on a saturday (which is pretty easy) by baking cupcakes(in cooporate for Father's Day and Mum's-just-got-home-after-work-day). nyeaha! i did. and it was nicely done. in fact, it was perfect! nyeaha! and guess what? i did it all by myself without mum's help! nyeaha! the cupcakes tasted so good, i wish i could switch it with the ones Sufi and friends had on his birthday. bahaha! i would be glad to send some to my friends especially, Suhaili, Humai, and Nard. but im afraid its getting late. maybe next time aye ladies. Jiaqi, i wouldnt mind sending some to you too(: and shaq (why didnt you ask me along for NDP ):)

oh yes! PICTURES!

so what do ya think?

school?

2010-06-13T04:04:00.000-07:00

what worries me most right now? let me list out these few things ;

lack of CE points are worrying me like hell! damn.
school starts tmr.
i have not clean my room. (this is a MUST).
school starts tmr.
i havent had sufficient revision for sports facilities and sports business. (damn you accounting!)
school starts tmr.
i didnt buy any new clothes for school.
SCHOOL FREAKING STARTS TMR!

DANG!

Oopee's 21st.

2010-06-12T06:00:00.000-07:00

reminder : this post is filled with too many broken english. forgive me. ill try to improve my language. thanks!

My Baby's 21st was a blast. slight glitches here and there, but we managed to make it through without Sufi having the slightest suspicions. it was hard, i have to admit. it was hard not to tell the truth. and along the way, heart break occurs more than expected. but that, i shall put aside. afterall everything went exceptionally well. Birthday Boy was sotong as hell. thats my favourite part, indeed.

lets start with many many days before the actual day. this 'mini gathering' was planned wayyy ahead. to be specific, 3 weeks earlier. due to recent problematic issues which i had to strongly dealt with, this whole gathering thing was pretty much 'uncertain'. but i just went ahead with it because i believe 'i can make things happen if i wanted to'. i decided to give it a shot, with lots of thinkable consequences intruding my mind. there's a high possibility that this event was a 'no go' due to my strict curfews, but im sure it doesnt kill to give it a try.

so yes, luck was on my side the day Afifah decides to ask how i was doing, on Facebook. fyi, she's Sufi's friend girlfriend. oh and a big hello to Jiaqi too if youre reading this. haha. so yes, that was really sweet of her to ask. by then, i knew i had wonderful opportunities popping up, and so i put my mind in it and went forward. was really hoping Ifah to agree and 'helped' along. sorry, but i know i cant do it all by myself if anyone asked me to. this part 'tak tau malu suruh orang tolong'. haha. but she was really nice, she agreed in a split second(!) she helped to plan, organize and gave valuable suggestions and comments that totally makes sense, all that i truly appreciate. she kept questioning how everything was going which increase the anxiety to get the plan succeeded.

which then i decided to plan along with my dear good friend, Suhaili to guide me along too. yes, she wasnt there on the actual day but she sure has done more than alot to help. she gave me the best advices and instructions to follow if things doesnt turns out right.

this morning, she came over as early as 830am to help me out with the 'Baking'. (ive gotta admit, something went wrong along the way, and i have to feed my guests some 'wet' biscuits. MAJOR FAILURE!). i woke up as early as 7am to get the ingredients ready (which in the end, we anyhow hantam bocai only, we didnt sift the flour nor did we blend the sugar, we believed 'alaaa go & die la, confirm okay one la nanti.) we were in a rush, so erm we didnt really put much of our hearts and souls in the baking. haha. So sorry Baby. the clock was ticking before we could even realize. which by the time the 'cake/biscuits' were done, i went to get myself ready. remember : we were chasing after time. i was mad disappointed that my hair was still wet and didnt volume up as planned, my cosmetics was all over the place(what pisses me the most : i didnt put on my newly bought mascara that i was so looking forward to boast off to Sufi). everything was a mess. last minute curfew changes, made it even worst. (PS : our meeting time was 1030am, i tried to wake Sufi up from 8am to 10am, but to no avail as usual. he sleeps macam log. i think log pon better than him ah. i think if i stick my finger up his nostrils pon tak sadar. confirm. i wonder how his bunk mates wake him up every morning. kudos to those who successfully wakes him up every single day, im sure you guys did it with your utmost effort.)

i was late to meet Ifah & Amirul to pass Sufi's present and the 'cakes/biscuits'. (apparently, i told Sufi i didnt get him anything this year which he truly believed, and i was only going out with him to the movies, karaoke and dinner.) Suhaili came along, which was a great help because i knew i would have melted halfway if she's werent with me. (then came this unexpected call from the birthday boy that he's out?!) i cant possibly tell him to meet at Compass Point cos he would get suspicious, so i was pretty caught in the middle, and had to tell him that id be late. by this time, he was pissed as hell. you have no idea how angry he was.

i decided to cab down few stops away to meet him, cos if i were to reach any later, im prepared to have my ears bleed(something that i assumed, but didnt happen(:). one thing he didnt know, Suhaili was with me. and as soon as i met him, she had to leave. Sufi suggested that we should have a meal together with her since she was there(and cos she helped ALOT), but it was too late, she already left. again, a couple blows came thrusting my already weak brain. i wasnt thinking, all i could say to Suhaili was just a mere thank you after all she has done. Sufi always came up with good points which hits me right in the head. sorry, i vehh slow.

we decided to give it away and continue with our initial plan ; to watch a movie. Killers by Ashton Kutcher and Katherine Heigl was awesome. hilarious is the word. a must watch. erm lets just skip that. (point to note ; everything was planned, including watching this movie. he has no idea, at all. it was some sort like an 'impromptu idea'.)

right after, i rushed him for karaoke. WE WERE LATE AT THIS POINT, cos the other couple already booked a room at Grandlink and was just waiting for our arrival. we were an hour late, mind you. (Thanks Bus no 21, we used to love having a ride in you during the Simei times, but not now. you're the cause to our one hour wasted!). but in the bus, i pretend to act like i wasnt hurrying (God knows what i was thinking inside). Sufi and I listened to songs from his phone. this boy has a fetish for oldies. we were listening to some err Daddy cool song, then Siti Haida by JeffryDin(yes, JEFFRYDIN! i have no idea what is up with him.) more oldies from the Carefree - Si Baju Hijau (seriously, i know youre in the army, im sure your sargents would have drown with more than needed aspirations, so i dont think you need to listen to 'Si baju hijau, yang sedang bertugas...' Baby? even if you want to, then dont go complaining about having a hard time in the forest. you wont credit the song any justice. HAHA.) he then changed the genre to rock, which was a definite blah-.- but i perked up as soon as he switches to ... err some recognizable songs. thank God!

the moment we reached, Ifah sent me a couple of texts if they could light the candles on the 'cakes/biscuits' already. it was definitely difficult to reply, cos Sufi was very observant.

S : ahhh. siapa msg tu?

F : ah err tak. ni Suhaili tanye how was it going. yaa...

S : are you keeping anything from me?

F : no la, change song change song.

surprisingly, he didnt give it much thoughts and we continued listening and continuing our way to Grandlink. i reminded him earlier i wanted a bigger room, maybe for 6 pax. his reply..

S : takde takde. yang kecik-kecik aje sudah. nanti kene bayar mahal.

F : alaaa, sempit la! CANNOT. I SAY I WANT MEANS I WANT.

S : CEREWET EH!

this part, my heart break you know. how can he say like that oneee. thank God he knows nothing about the plan, so i just let it pass without complaining further. we went from room to room. Ifah & Amirul was in room 26. we walked pass, but Sufi didnt realise them in the room. Potek ah this one. i saw them waited for their signal, and told Sufi to get in the room.

this part paling best. he was shocked. speechless. stood stiff. and dont-know-what-to-do. trust me, its never easy to get him surprised (cos maybe my previous plans arent efficient enough). he later explained to me that he doesnt know if Amirul & Ifah was there on purpose or coincidence. but with the 'cake/biscuits' in hand and the candles all light up, he was sure something was going on. i noticed, a couple of times he steal a sly look on me, cos he never would have thought i was getting along with his friends (i have never been out with his friends, you see). so yes, there he was, smiling sheepishly in front of us , forgotten to blow off the candles. haha. what a funny sight. i then, passed him his present which he never would have expected. A Celio mens jacket he has been eyeing for the longest time. Alhamdulillah he likes it. alot. :D

"ohhh, sejak bila you dah pandai berpakat dengan my friends ehhh."

it was sad cos Hadi & gf, Haida werent there to join us with the whole surprise thingy. but its alright, they came about in awhile. so they didnt miss that much,though.had fun singing out louddd, laughing at 'terkehel' voices. but time was really catching up. without us knowing, we had to end the session to continue with dinner at Hajjah Maimunah. great choice of food place to dine in. but unfortunately, i had to rush to get home on time. annoying indeed, but im left with no choice. i felt really bad to leave the other 2 couples first. but i managed to thank them before i left. as usual, Sufi sent me home.

it was a wonderful day. but first, let me thank my dear Sufi Hizrian for enduring and being patient with me having to rush you here and there. thank you for liking the present. thank you for relieving my worries that L is totally the right size for you. thank you for erm, paying for erm some of the things. above all, thank you so much for enjoying this day. iloveyou.

next up, thank you to Suhaili who willingly helped me along the way. the advices given were faithfully heeded. Alhamdulillah everything went well. thank you for waking up early(cos i know you dont usually does). thank you for dressing up even when you know youre only involved in less than a quarter of the day. thank you for your faith that this will end up well.

thank you to Afifah and Amirul for working well with me. sorry for the countless last minute changes. thank you for being exceedingly positive about this whole event. thank you for coming down to collect the presents and the tak menjadi 'cake'. thank you for going along with what ive wanted.

and thank you Hadi and Haida for coming over too. truly sorry i wasnt talking much. shy la. haha. but really thank you for making the event a whole lot chirpier. thank you for staying through out the event till the end.

till then. imma have a good long rest. sorry to bore you readers with my lengthy post.

thank you all, for reading.

what you made up from the sky.

2010-06-09T04:39:00.000-07:00

i was 'forced' by my Love, to finish up my school assignments. haha. for 'my own good' nevertheless, cos ive been dreading to finish it up for the past few days already. main reason - 'i damn lazy laa, tomorrow i will finish it up okay'. comes tomorrow, my word document hasnt been editted(yet again). and today, i think Sufi just cant take it no more. as soon as i sent him this ;

'hi baby, i rest dulu kay while waiting for my nasi goreng ikan bilis...'

he gave me a call to push me forward and finish up my work asap. he sounded serious. for a moment, i was dumbfounded, and throughout the convo, i only aswered 'okay, ill do it now..' then .. when he got to know i dont feel kinda easy rushing with my work, he assured me that i will do well and that he's not forcing. he has been reminding me every night and along came words of encouragement. so, how could i possibly not be taken in? and yes, so here i am (oh erm, put aside blogging this for a moment) trying really hard to get it over & done with.

seriously, wish me luck. cos im already feeling extremely sleepy.

3 items to start off with ..

2010-06-07T03:56:00.000-07:00

So as to start off with the make-up passion of mine, mum bought me a...

True Match concealer, Loreal.

Lash Prism Mascara, Silkygirl.

Maybelline limited edition BB cream.

first off, ive been dying to get myself a concealer for awhile now. yes. there's not very much to conceal on my face though, probably because i only use make up whenever i have the mood to(?). so yes, ive only gotta cover up some very tiny pimple scars that are countable. erm haha! i didnt have to have one actually, when i come to think of it. but i just like applying it. unbelievable but yes. ive been raving about cosmetic products for awhile now, but ive only used it for a few times(i mean, those that i have with me before mum FINALLY decides to buy me more, she knows im 'not' going to use as much anyway, so yeah-.-). i like the clean effect after applying the true match concealer on my face.

im not a 'Mascara Girl'. i know there are many girls out there who cant leave their homes without applying mascara. as for me, i am very clumsy/silly/pretty rough. my eyes are one of my most sensitive features. i teared instantly whenever i apply eye make up (especially those below my eyelids) and i tend to rub my eyes whenever i wanted to and without concerning if i had something on it (eg ; eyeliner). ill just got straight to rub it. and then when i realised i got my eyeliner on, ill flipped! ill ask whoever's with me to see if i smudged my eyeliner, but of course i already did. too late to regret. this is how i always am. but this time, since mum already bought me one, ill try to take better caution not to spoil my whole make up. i really have to. but i wouldnt suggest you to buy Lash Prism, possibly if you found or already own one that is better than this, stick to it. the 'brush' is pretty thin and youve gotta repeat your motion a couple of times.

Finally, a BB cream. i've never used one of this either. i have no idea what it is, or what is it used for. how dumb. but, when i was walking around in the store a few days back, i found this, read the uses of it and decided to give it a try. but what i like most about this product is that, i can cover up my blemishes. ive got lots of them, to tell you the truth. and so, it is only right to own one of this.

good buys. definitely gonna be the essential need before leaving home. not only i'll feel better with make up on, these products have their own individual benefits too (eg; SPF sunblocks, whitening effect, moisturising). worth my momma's money!

beauty vlogs.

2010-06-05T00:34:00.001-07:00

again, a pretty productive day indeed. did the laundry, the dishes, the fridge organizing. pretty much tidying up the kitchen, for the last 2 hours. very satisfied. i didnt put my day to waste. so yeah, nice(:

anyways, still waiting for mum to get home with KFC chickens (hopefully). yes, i love chicken a hell lot. i have to eat almost all dishes with chicken in it. but i would only eat, the 'soft tender' part of the poor chicken. drumsticks, thigh. other than that, someone else would be lucky to have it. very picky eater, yes. why am i talking about fat chickens? i dont knowww.

what a day. just keeping myself entertained at home. cleaned the house. and surfing the net. basically i am just watching a few beauty vlogs (mostly from Blair's channel, she's awesome), tweeting, tumblring, bloglovin - just to fill up the remnance hours before night comes.

ah yes, talking about bloglovin, im actually following MKA's (non-official page, i think), and look what i found...

such fashion icon. and yes, if you'd ask me, id prefer celebrities every day looks as compared to red carpet looks. pretty much cos i know i wont be seen wearing anything like that. so yeah. not that im all into fashion that i would wear anything similar to these stars, but just .. i wish i can pull off a decent fashionable look without having to try so hard. yes, i admit im not fashionable in any case. but it doesnt kill to love fashion and try to be like one.

i love cosmetics too. (despite having less than what any average girl owns). im just too blunt when it comes to applying some make up techniques to my own face. something i would gladly admit is that i am very paranoid. as a matter of fact, i would usually flip every single time i dont feel good about something, especially something i have on or anything like that, really. thats just me. its a bad thing though. seems like im adding more things to my 'need-to-change' list.

been wanting to get more eyeshadow palletes with more colours in it. i wish my mum could buy me at least one.

i am inspired to ..

2010-06-04T04:49:00.000-07:00

i think i can kiss myself goodbye to 'daily updates'. something in me just stops myself from remaining constant. where are the inspirations every time i need one? annoying, really. yes, i probably have been updating too much about my love affair. if it disgusts any of you readers, my apologies. i just cant help it. i receive no comments from any readers, so i thought it would be alright, until recently i was telling Sufi about this girl who blogs about her boyfriend on every single posts can be pretty annoying. and he was like 'well, what would you feel if others says the same about your blog too?'. reality check - he is so true. so maybe, i could try lessen that down.

first off, let me note this down before my memory fails on me.

i am inspired to keep myself clean and organised.
i am inspired to pay back my fasts. (please God, make this happen.)
i am inspired to use whatever is available for me be it beauty care products etc.
i am inspired to stay closer to Allah.
i am inspired to improve my English.

recent do's : i have uploaded up to 10 apps for my phone today(mostly games, word games). something that goes to show i get bored easily whenever im alone (waiting for calls, on my way to school or just sitting bored at home).

i need to plan out something beneficial for myself this holiday. though im left with just a week more to go, i wanna feel the satisfaction at the end of the day. really gotta do something about this.

excuse me but i really have to say this;

hi baby, i had fun today. i mean always, whenever im with you. & Shrek was awesome. thank you for everything. Much Love.

please rain tonight.

2010-05-30T06:36:00.001-07:00

“Let the rain kiss you. Let the rain beat upon your head with silver liquid drops. Let the rain sing you a lullaby.”

—	Langston Hughes

sugar rushes.

2010-05-29T03:28:00.000-07:00

lovers, we are.

someone has came up with the idea to take up car license first. and no, it's not me. Sufi is. if you have been following me on twitter, you would've known what i meant. apparently he has been driving illegally yesterday(hmm), and today he enthusiastically explained to me on our chat page on how he could 'drive so well'. from the look on his face(we were web-camming), i can easily tell he wasnt making it all up. im truly looking forward to him sitting on my right side, steering the wheel. but then again, i might just have to wait, cos there's a high possibility, he'll only take up lessons when he's done with NS. which is like a year more to go. i shall not complain too much. ill leave it to fate. (:

today, i lazied about at home. it kills not having a new novel with me. uhhuh, been complaining non-stop without making an attempt to buy/borrow one. im just being myself here.

truth to be told, i secretly wish im in Paris or New York right now. fat hope, i know. but seriously. it would have been wonderful, being all alone in a different country. im up for anything that might amaze me, i would drop by any candy stores(hehe), i would walk around in gorgeous jackets with knee-high boots. i would do anything while the day last. oh, how i wish.

i procrastinated way too much today.

an hour isnt enough.

2010-05-24T06:28:00.000-07:00

JUS on Suria awhile ago, kinda give me an idea about 'something' that's coming up pretty soon.

still feeling sleepy despite having an hour power nap. Sufi didnt 'agree' to me having a 'power nap' in the first place because he said 'i wont be able to wake up'. urm, is pot calling the kettle black? (: but i appreciate your sweet intentions, Love. he's just afraid i wouldnt be able to have our usual night chats and missed out on my RJ if i hadnt wake up. thats really sweet.

Tumblr is getting more and more interesting now. as & when im about to close my tabs, there comes the pretty pictures and wonderful qoutes on my screen.

OKAY. i need my sleep. gotta stop now.

toodles!

'we're young, we're strong'.

2010-05-23T02:50:00.001-07:00

yes, probably.

this time, i have a definite purpose to be online. i need to get all the folders, inbox etc organized. im done with my personal email, following up would be school email. sadly, i dont check my school email regularly. ive gotta make a change on that though, cos i would be missing out on opportunities. school-related opportunities.

for now, songs played on a moderate volume will suffice. not all hyped me, thats why. too many things invading my mind. it's been pilling up. very very unnecessary things. not making enough progress here, dont you think :/ i need to get a grip, man.

sidetrack part 1) 'wait! one lesson learnt today. RP students, do not postpone your RJ, be it for daily problems or CE talks. as for me, i attended a talk for nothing, cos .. you know the reason why. ugh.'

so anyways, ive been dragging this post for about a few hours now. heh. im done with emails. next up, pre-readings for microecons(ugh), tumblr updates and arranging my folders in presario. i have over 400 updates @ Bloglovin. since i pretty much have nothing to do right now, let me finish it all at once. did i mention im watching 500 days of summer, too? and urm, texting Sufi all at the same time. major multitasking mode.

and then, right after this, ive gotta tidy up my room. but of course, my usual Sunday routine. im pretty settled with what ive planned to so far. thats a good sign. so its all good.

sidetrack part 2) i just told my mum to kill a baby lizard. oh how so cruel of me.

so anyways, i would propose to all to take a listen to Kick Ass movie soundtrack by Mika. totally marvellous. guess who got me hooked to these songs again? Sufi Hizrian! stop sending youtube links to me already! haha no, im kidding, really. he really has a good sense of understanding what type of songs 'suit' him well, and coincidentally, i like it all too. talk about coincidences huh.

its 9pm already, and Presario's motherboard(is that what they usually calls it?) is burning hot. oh & before i forget, guess what. Baby dropped my Presario in the bus on our way home today. thank God, Presario didnt 'suffer' any defects, if not ... haha! but ive forgiven you baby. so not to worry. alrighty ya'll. will try to update tomorrow.

317)

2010-05-22T06:59:00.000-07:00

decent apologies to all for the lack of updates.

for those who still reads, i will try my best very best to update daily. but then again no promises, because blogging (for me) needs my highest interest whenever i do a posting. that so called 'interest' may not be with me all the time, i hope that explains.

anyway, my life has been fine, by far. adequately acceptable. not all that happy and chirpy me. but with the specks of happiness day by day, everything has been falling in place. i must say, all thanks to my Sufi for staying patient and strong despite all the 'shits' we've been through. if it wasnt for him pulling me up, i wouldnt be where i am right now. i respect him for his dauntless character. he will go all the way out for what he wants, but that attitude is kinda lacking in me(for God knows why). adopting positivity will be my next step. its funny how i could be giving positive advices to those who needs it but finds it difficult to apply those positivity to my own problems. this just concludes how much of a failure i can be. no wonder im too reliant on everyone else except myself. oh right, this whole paragraph has just measured up my worthless thoughts.

good gosh, what is wrong with me?

alright, let me put it all aside and enlighten you with more intriguing facts. there's something that has been thriving me to take up 'lessons' that could benefit myself & my family. except, i wont be bursting the balloon now, lets just keep the cat in the bag. when the time is right, and probably when i have started to take up these 'lessons', you might just get the whole idea. now is not the time. cos i am still wondering if it will work. but, pray hard.

apart from that, not trying to be desperate and all, im just inviting all to follow my tumblr and twitter pages. haha. tumblr does play a part in my daily activity. there's never a day in school have i been missing out on tumblr. pretty pictures and inspiring quotes helps alot. they make you think, so why not? why not make your life easier. hey, im actually following the right route. (: so to all, create an account if you dont have one. it'll make that few seconds of reblogging in your life worthwhile. trust me. and twitter, it'll help you destress in a way. well as for me, i do it all the time. whenever there's a confession to make, twitter comes first. hmm, that could actually be the reason to why this page was neglected. haha.

its settled then. i hope my suggestions works(:

Lady Gaga Goes Out in See-Through Underwear

2010-05-11T05:13:00.000-07:00

"My grandmother is basically blind, but she can make out the lighter parts, like my skin and hair," she told Rolling Stone. "She says 'I can see you, because you have no pants on.' So I'll continue to wear no pants so that my grandma can see."

seriously. i would prefer her earlier wardrobe than the latest. her fashion isnt making any sense. its good that she's been thinking out of the box but, too revealing and extreme psychedelics doesnt make you any sexier.

source ; US weekly.

Ip Man.

2010-05-10T21:45:00.000-07:00

im watching Ip Man in the sly, while doing my powerpoint slides. but im almost done anyway, so no rush. im watching Ip Man on youtube first, because i dont want to disappoint my dear boyfriend who has been so eager to watch Ip Man 2. i always declined his offer to watch it on cinema cos frankly, i am no longer a fan of movies. i just dislike the idea of sitting for about 2 hours just watching the big screen and do nothing in between. its getting a little too boring for me. i'd prefer 'exploring', or just being adventurous (not that there are many such places in Singapore, of course). i just dont like staying rigid in my seat. thats all.

but as for this case, ive decided to be nice. (Sufi always has to give in to me, just so ill achieve the best satisfaction(?) for the rest of the day. so im actually trying to do my part in our almost 2 year long relationship. actually, im not trying to be nice. i AM nice. haha. he would sooo disagree with that. and also, this idea is suppose to be a surprise for him. since he's back in camp, there is no way he could use the internet to check up on my blog. oh & even if he can, i am so certain he'd rather choose facebook than my blog(: ... -.- but anyways, lets just hope my plan this time will work. i would wanna purchase the tickets like maybe a day before? so i could just bring him to the cinema once the time arrives. im so bad at surprises(unlike him), so i need your support :/ thanks :D

candles

2010-05-08T07:42:00.000-07:00

You are my light.

i hope Baby is having soccer fun with his friends right now. its so cute, he brought his two younger brothers along, & was giggling when he told me about it. apart from that, he got really excited to inform me about his newly arrival Chevron's card. (with many privilleges i must add.) i told him to text me about it cos i was having dinner with my family, but he insisted to tell me straight on the phone. haha. he was really excited i can tell. especially the karaoke privilleges for members. yes, we are karaoke-tics. ^^ we'll drop by soon Chevron.

freaking!

2010-05-07T05:49:00.000-07:00

first up, apologies for my sudden reappearance after missing for a long time. i have been doing nothing. im not having problems or any of that sort.

shopkeepers in my neighbourhood freaking need to make a trip to the upgrading classes to adopt customer service etiquette man. yes, im pissed. i mean cmon. they should go all out to attend to their customer's needs, not freaking shake your head and give me you're freaking blackest face. you gain profit from us, your freaking customers. so please, with all due respect. no, you dont earn my respect. just change freaking people. ugh. man, am i pissed.

sorry, i just need to let it out. i feel annoyed. maybe my period is coming or something. i havent done my rj. my brother just had to vaccuum the house right this moment(seriously, you could just use the broom, it will suffice.) and to Baby ; i think i need to apologise to you before hand. i'll be complaining about what just happened between me & that stupid black face uncle (and by 'black face' i dont mean he's dark or an indian, he's a chinese and he just gave me that freaking dumb frown look.) i know youre already calming me down on our chat page right now. but i dont think its sufficient. i still need to ramble more. i know you dont mind(:

the thought of the dish i had for dinner with Suhaili at Tong Seng awhile ago, enlightens my mind, in a way(: i had chicken feet noodle and o m g wasnt it the best foreign food ive ever eaten so far? despite Suhaili gag at the sight of me biting off the small bones from the feets, i continued eating like no one cares. it just tasted so incredibly good. i was proud of myself, cos today, i did not give up on my food halfway. hehe. Baby would be so proud. :D

i, personally, dont hope to Choke.

2010-04-24T06:16:00.000-07:00

its ultimately dumb that Starhub has to spoil my night! (not to mention that my night is already.. too 'spoilt' for me to handle!) like seriously?! how could they overcharge my phone bills?! in the first place, why the hell are there, TWO $59 subscription charges printed on it?? TWO!!! that has already cost me $118! i cant blame myself for over using only $6, which overall adds up to $120 for my March & April phone bill! (take note : my $6 over usage, is no biggie. BUT NOT $59 FOR THE MONTH OF MAY WHICH I HAVENT USE UP FOR?!)

im telling you, im gonna march right up to Starhub's HQ very soon (not tonight of course) to claim my money! grraaaahhhh! im pissed to the coreeeee!

am i being too melodramatic right here? im sorry. no offense. but seriously, some day you'll just feel the need to release the demon in you. well as for me, Starhub needs to be mocked at.

just a gentle reminder. stop overcharging. you might lose more customers day after day. lucky for you, im not one of them. cos why? im tied to your 2 year plan(!) so treat me well.

im currently blowing/sucking mini pearls out of the smaller sized straw from a bubble tea drink (of course). yes, my uncle brought home the wrong straw. but guess what? i wasnt pissed. *flashed a smile. in fact, i find several ways to help me drink .. at ease? (sometimes, you just need comfort right?) but as usual, its all up to no use. because i gave up half way. i cant be bothered to waste my time searching so i struggled with the small straw. we cooporate really well, me & the straw(:

yes im trying to make myself happy here if you cant see.

i think im starting to lose my sense of hearing, for my left ear. no im not kidding. it does feel odd. i have to cup my ear a couple of times to reassure both sides are balance. i have no idea if it has leftover shower water in it. you might ask : how the hell did i get it in there? I DONT KNOW. but you must know, this sure doesnt feel too good.

im not going to vote for emotional tonight. cos afterall, i believe we could make it work(:

Angel vs Devil

2010-04-24T05:16:00.003-07:00

in a state of anger, no one cares about neutratility. but then again, a relationship considers two human being, two heads combined together, to solve, to make it better. egos aside. maybe not so fast. give it some time. still, put it away.

words are not just words. they hurt, they ache this fragile beating heart. yes they play a part. why give in? why apologise out of pretense? i am not going to stood low. to bow my head. the words i took in, they leave permanent scars.

prolong? you are just making it worst. stop adding salt to the wound. you are hurting yourself more than you ever know. back off, take some time to think. need not be harsh. remember the consequences?

this is mental. God have mercy.

you need some time alone. but please, think wisely.

confused. clueless. clearly The Lost Mind.

4th.

2010-04-22T04:53:00.000-07:00

things to do list ;

update tumblr. (i missed it)
remove unnecessary files in Presario.
convert movies to Iphone.
take down useful points from borrowed Cleo Mag.
profile-hopping and worship their glorious lives.
download and read pre-readings.
organize Year 2 folders.
wash my face, and put on cream & body lotion.
wait up for Bb's call. (DO NOT FALL ASLEEP, FINI!)
watch Shinee Hello Baby. (jsyk, im already at EP 10. thats fast.)
wonders why Bb's so into Korean girls music videos nowadays. (super mad annoying)
iron out tmr's outfit.
dream of getting Frolicks only next week-.-
fantasize what im gonna do with my pay :D
START DOING ANYTHING .. O N E B Y O N E.
forget about joining any IG, cos its either im too late or too useless.
plan out a meeting with the girls.

im done here. will update tmr. most possibility assured(:

tall. too tall.

2010-04-14T19:32:00.000-07:00

me : you went out with the SM people right?
jun : yeah. i kinda know some of them. you know them?
me : yeah i guess so..
jun : which one you know?
me : *points at Sufi's picture. err my boyfriend?
jun : oh my God, Sufi is your boyfriend? omg really??
me : haha. okay shhh. youre talking too loud.
jun : i didnt knowww. he's fucking tall.

you see Baby, the first thing my friends notice about you, is your height. you're too tall. and no one notice me.

why like thatttt?

ANNOYING.

2010-04-12T05:23:00.000-07:00

humai called me 'annoying' cos i cant stop going to 'someone's' profile. haha! i cant stop getting jealous when there's nothing to be jealous about. seriously. actually, i find myself somewhat dumb to have done so(Sufi will definitely agree with this). but i will not stop. haha. im so used to it(:

again, i think my eyesight is failing. im having blur visions every now & then. & its frustrating. i have to blink my eyes several times to get to see things clearly. i need to get a new pair of specs, but i have no idea when? -.-

oh & i just got back from Malacca, my aunt's house. its very heartwarming, as usual. i went shopping at Dataran Pahlawan after successful persuasions. but there's nothing to buy in the end-.- i bought a few useless stuffs tho. i thought maybe i need to use up at least A 50ringgit.

on our last day there, we made a pit stop at a pharmacy before driving home, & i found what ive always wanted from the store. this...

yes, full Garnier light skincare set. uhhuh. they're selling at almost the same price as in here in sg, but i bought it still cos, 'malaysian ringgit dont mean a thing' when i was there. really. sgd means alot, & ive always tried to save so i would still have some money the next day. pathetic. whatever. im glad i bought myself a full skincare products. trust me. i can be a bit boyish at times. oh i just remembered this..

dad: pergilah pakai bedak(make up) sikit adik.

me: for what, tak payah lah. malas tau.

dad: eh eh, perempuan ape mcm ni? dengan muke masai mcm tu.

me: alaa, da malam lagi pon. tkde org nk tgk(:

you see. hopeless daughter uh this one. but seriously, i cant be bothered with make up AT TIMES. even with the boyfriend, i would ask him the occasional question 'are you okay with me not wearing make up?' but of course he doesnt mind. really. he did admit he would like to see me with make up on sometimes, & thats the reason i dressed myself well on occasional dates. yes, occasionally only. i dont carry a bag full of cosmetics with me. actually i dont even have a bag to fit one-.-

on a second thought, i dont really like to wear make up cos, i dont like to wash my face when i get back home. yes, i will reach for my bed straight. i dont like to shower at night. uhhhuh i admit. & i will keep wondering the whole night if my face will turn ugly with pimples as soon as i woke up, & it sure did :/ therefore, the few reasons i bought this set are 1) this skincare product will help lighten my skin(ive been longing to have a fair skin). 2) im a girl, i need to start caring for my skin. 3) ive been eyeing for it, so i need to make myself feel good that they will work for me. HEH!

oh! Sufi just texted. (he's still in Brunei, & the cost for roaming calls & texts are fucking expensive la! expect me to hear lesser from him the next few days). i need to go. i need to wash my face first. SEMANGAT!

right now, a kiss and a hug will suffice.

2010-04-08T05:12:00.000-07:00

I have a couple of random thoughts going on in my brain, now.

Am exchanging pretty lengthy texts with Sufi who's in Brunei, right now. yes, you got that right. for ten full days. i wasnt able to send him off, (which btw his mum asked for me. heh!), as if that wasnt bad enough, i also didnt present him with any send-offs gift or whatsoever. instead, he gave me one(!) - a golden snake bangle (which i initially wanted to buy so bad, but he said "no!" to. why? cos, 'it wasnt worth my penny"). why thank you Cupcake, for every single thing you did for these past few days<333.

Apart from that, i have to proudly admit, i am doing perfectly fine right now(after very much self-persuasion though). despite waking up early in the morning for work, with nothing to look forward to( =Sufi's morning texts), i managed to do quite a good job in the store. its nice to know, saturday would be my final working day.

Somehow, without the realisation of it, i miss tumblring. or in simple words - going online. the free data bundle entitled to my phone is not sufficient enough for me to surf different pages all at the same time. i am not oblige to enter many tabs at one go. the screen is either to small or typing on touchscreen is a hassle. not that i regret buying The Phone(cos i pay half the monthly bill = lesser money for shopping), but .. i just need something fully working, something i could depend on at the peakest moment. true enough, i can never be decently satisfied with anything i own, and i think that trait needs a change. i could make it work. i think.

I have the itch of having braces before school reopens, but..

me: excuse me, how much do i have to pay if i wanna put braces on?

her: $4000 onwards (:

Totally diminish the level of my temporary excitement (i actually visuallised myself having braces on along with black geeky specs. heh). how ive regretted not accepting mum's-super-willing offer many many years back when she saw my vamp tooth. but back then, braces are not the 'in' thing yet. ): just not my luck.

I would gladly watch a meteor shower (if there's any) alone, anytime now. some lovin' for God's Greatest world beauty and nature. (Alhamdulillah(: Ayah can walk on his own w/o relying on his walking stick anymore, just need a lil more practise tho.)

at present several drops of sweat are rolling down my cheeks & i dont understand why. is it the weather or just me. oh yeah, i think i need to take a bath. HEK!

toodles.

p/s: 10 more days. SOOP! meet your Cikgu Bedah next Sunday okay. MUST!
p/p/s : oh, & did i tell you i spent the whole 2 hours with Mai & Nard last week? it isnt enough tho. ):

sigh.

2010-04-04T03:34:00.000-07:00

upon boarding the bus. i receive a call...

him : hey baby.
me : hi? (:
him : i miss you already. i promise you this will be the first & the last time you'll be going home by yourself after being out with me. i dont like it this way.
me : aww thats really sweet baby. ill be fine. ill take good care on my way home alright. just have fun with your friends(:

apparently, there was a last min call from his SM friends for a reunion meet up. i dont want to stop him from going, cos seriously - i already got pretty pissed trying to find him in many SM pictures but to no avail. & its been awhile since he last had a casual meet up with his school friends. i (maturely) decided to 'release' him from my clutch (HAHA) and get home by myself (which is the first & pure rarity). actually, to think of it. im big enough to travel on my own. haha. really. it was a tough decision, not for me but him. he said too many "alah, tak biase la you balik sorg sorg." haha. but i got home safe & sound. slept immediately as soon as i called to tell him that im home. yes, i was thaaaat tired.

& you must know, its finally a day off from work for me. to be honest, work is a dread. finally, tmr will be my last week working. ive earned a fair amount of salary(i guess). just enough to pay half of my phone bills and shop for school clothes. so yeah, i think thats.. okay. okay not exactly. i think one can never be satisfied of anything they own.

its already 730pm, & my phone is still silent.

2 years ago.

2010-03-17T07:15:00.000-07:00

"AKU SERIOUSLY CANNOT TAHAN KETAWE WATCH THIS LEGEND VIDEO OF US THREE! HAHAHAHAHA!"

ps: sorry for the messy room state.

THIS WAS 2 YEARS AGO.

SO THAT MESS DOES NOT & WILL NEVER APPLY TO MY ROOM NOW!

boredom.

2010-03-14T04:18:00.000-07:00

i was let off from work early today, cos.. my 'bestfriend' has decided to finally come & pay me a visit. how sweet. NOT. i am suffering right now. the cramps are unbearable. i rushed to the toilet 4 times earlier this morning. i hate it. the moodswings doesnt help either. poor Sufi, hissed by me a few times. sorry Love. he's going Tekong tmr = no phone, no contacting, NOTHING. plus, my parents are out of town. so that leaves me being, alone, all by myself. not really. my brother & my uncle will be around(there's no way my parents will ever leave me all alone at home, they called several times to check if im okay = i cannot leave the house.) howells):

my job & me? its a love hate affair. i allow myself to believe, for a fleeting moment, im doing it for the sake of trying to live in the working life. & now that i finally got myself involved. there's no way out for the next 2/3 weeks. so hang on little girl. what you'll gonna get in the end, is worth it(:

there is a correlation between the weather and my moods. im feeling cold. & im loving every inch of chill it gives me. i dislike, weary-dready humid weather. it pisses me off. so im appreciating every moment of it.

thank you Allah(:

i promise you, im gonna spend a day in front of you.

2010-03-08T23:02:00.000-08:00

i am loving the scent of my hair. mum just massaged Safi's olive oil to it, & wow. kinda reminisced those younger days where mum would pull me out of bed to get me seated down straight, & tug on my hair, massaging my scalp. the reason to my used to be thick hair, revealed. olive oil is good for your scalp. it kinda makes the whole hair growing thing healthier. & yes, it is even recommended on Seventeen magazine by Singapore's most popular hair stylist - to put on olive oil to your scalp 20 mins before you start shampooing. it'll help to moisturise your strands, in a way. did you realise, im trying really hard to care so much more for my hair? well yes, apparently, in the life of Fini, hair starts to fall more & more, day after day, it scares me. so im actually making an effort to keep it healthy, the easy way, ( & maybe cheaper too.)

im currently watching blair's everyday make up/hair tutorials on Youtube. she's amazing. the idea, we dont really have to go to that extent to make ourselves look good, has always been applied in her video. call me one proud subcriber.

totally one of my favourites. (:

advertorial? i wish.

2010-03-07T05:03:00.001-08:00

i need some chips right now. badly. it'll get along really well with milo & pearls. a perfect combo for night snacks.

the thought of already being multiple-ly busy the past few days(& going to, for the weeks to come), totally dampens my mood. im very much of a morning person(now, that i just realised), im working from 9 to 5 tomorrow onwards. actually, this is pretty enlightening. not having to turning in late and walking down the lonely streets back home alone is.. refreshing. and very much secured. also because, my hero is not anywhere above me .. flying his way to my place. he's stuck in camp, the whole week. and guess what, he's going on field camp? whut. seriously. so does it makes me feel better or worst. well of course, you know the answer.

i havent been stacking myself up with the everyday news.

i have been missing alot from tumblr.

i made people missed out updates on my life. (ha ha, as if anybody really cares)

i struggled with sleep, & time for my family, sufi & the girls.

i havent had time to eat the right food, at the right time. (yes, i am getting fatter)

but i did pamper myself with one thing - hair mask.

haha. essential hair mask, to be more accurate. it really is worth buying. i didnt regret paying $8.90(i got a discount, HAHA!) for a hair product. and proof to be told, my hair does feel lighter and smoother. and must you know, i dont trust commercial products very much. to me, these ambassadors praises these products just because they have to. well, they earn money from doing it, dont they? so yeah, im feeling so nice, to let my readers(as if i have many) experience the same sensational mind blowing goodness feeling thats flowing in me, right now. yes, i used it this morning and see, im still feeling great even now.

here's a picture of the essential hair mask. (extracted from xiaxue's blog.)

its good, try it. did i just got myself to do an advertisement? nope. not really(:

proceeding on with my story, besides having a reckless job that resides me to my bed everytime i comes home, i still need an attempt to get to sleep. cos when youre boyfriend isnt around to 'virtually' cuddle you in bed, you might as well stay up all night. but Sufi is sweet enough to make an effort every single time for me to have a good night sleep. every night. (: so, thank you Baby.

& yes, i had a great fun last night. finally a few hours to retrieve the times we've missed. and that few hours is worth it. with us holding hands, corny jokes followed by giggly laughters, grooving to 'we are the world 25 for Haiti' & guessing the singers, you rapped & im the t-pain robotic's voice, light smooches in between, dining in at hajjah maimunah and ... ice skating eh? yes, its our first, but o m g, wasnt it FUN? i would say YES YES YES. im not that all good, and he's a fast learner, so what does that makes me? i must admit i was a pain in the ass. and totally disrupts his fun. he had to slowly train me how to glide, how i had to lean forward and not standing up straight. i made such a fuss. but i didnt give up, and that's what matters. i didnt fall on bum, never. Sufi did. at least there's a slight difference. haha. on the contrary, the whole new experience was just what we need. and we love it. not many pictures were taken. and none is highly acceptable to be posted here, cos i totally dressed in slack. will post it up one if i changed my mind.

this is to make up to my readers for ive been missing out. sorry, once again.

work.

2010-03-03T19:18:00.000-08:00

i need to socialise. i need to socialise. i need to socialise. MORE. *repeat this with me.

it bothers me alot that im too 'on my own'. of course, i have no one to blame, but i feel just like a loser. Sufi is gonna kill me if he knows ive been enteringdifferent unnecessary profiles that makes me feel this way. he tried so hard to make me stop feeling this way, & that i should make a change when school reopens. but im being hard headed anyways. i guess i should stop now. i shouldnt let this people get in my head. i just need a change. sorry BB.

oh & yeah, talking about changes. im actually a ... workaholic. NOT. super no no. i thought work would be easy but i was absolutely wrong. work is never easy. i love it when its busy but hate it when i have to wait for time to pass by. -.- it'll only intrigues me when i have something to do, like lots of them cos only then i made myself look away from my watch. 8 to 9 hours of work bores me to death. but then again, i need to work to earn myself some money. not just for myself though. you see, as you grow older, you tend to be wiser. you have to know what is going on in the real world. you tend be much more responsible. you tried to take matters in hand. you work hard, to make it happen. & that is exactly what im doing right now. its nice to know i have someone who's in the same position as i am. (:

i dread at the thought of going to work now. yes, 2 to 10pm. i hate closing i hate closing i hate closing. die die die!

ARGHHHHHH!

words, good ones, are all i need right now.

2010-02-22T04:17:00.000-08:00

chocolate waffle with cornflakes would do me real good right now. howells, i guess i just got myself in a mild misery.

1) the boy's got himself stucked for err field camp i guess. received an abrupt call from him earlier on, how he had to rush getting everything packed. such a pity. but Baby, you'll do fine. and im gonna miss you, i mean i already am, its gonna have pretty much addition to it, thats all.
2) its work training tmr. and... im going to be alone. yes, all by myself. with Sufi out there(w/o his phone), i have no one else to utter my nonsense to. im pretty reserved all by myself, im not sure if anyone's gonna make an approach to me. im sure Mai & Nard will laugh at me for being so kental, (like the day i messed up my interview, HAHA). furthermore, im not prepared to disturb them in school. but Thank God, Suhaili suggested she meet up with me after training which is very lightening. really. (: but never mistook me, i love to be alone, at certain time or situations.

aside miseries, i feel very much complete since ive got everything ready for work. pretty much all set. im bringing together with me, seventeen magazine, a story book & word search, just in case i fall in a daze & lose that morning smile along the way. if you hadnt know me well yet, i need at least A something to distract me from getting bored, every single time. really. one thing i dislike most would be - waiting. i dislike waiting, it bores me to no end. i do not like to wait neither do i like to make people wait. this balances out, totally. so, point noted?

ive packed my bag, i did my tumblr updates, facebook status updates. oh yes, i missed out on twitter. sorry about that, (for those who followed). i'll keep it updated, asap.

2010-02-21T00:53:00.000-08:00

& yes, im gonna miss you too, sweetie. ):

today, i asked Baby to check out busses for me to to get to my workplace. yes, im gonna start working next week, which is scary because its my first in the retail industry. so i am very kental, i have no idea how to get to my appointed store.

and it happens, the Boy just had to come up with this. how so adorable. he was worried i might get lost along the way.

i think the map with important points to take note of is cute, but he doesnt think so. haha.

but thank you Baby, for being ever so concern.

iloveyou.

2010-02-17T20:47:00.000-08:00

can you, Sufi Hizrian, please just end NS asap so you could continue your studies at RP ans schooling with me at the same, i dont mind if im in Year 3 & youre in Year 1 and our classes gonna clash most of the time, but we're still gonna meet at the end of the day because each of us are willing to wait no matter how long it takes just to see one another, omg seriously no kidding, end NS fast(in which, come to think about it, youll only end the whole serving the nation thing by next year in May, omg that is still like many many more months to go omg) but i dont care, you have to get a diploma & please be in Republic because im in in RP & its only fair if youre in RP too because im in, okay what the heck, im losing my breath, just get to ORD fast!

*heave a huge breathe release.

did you notice that i didnt put an ending/fullstop to the whole sentence up there? yes, thats how i talk to him everytime(when i have some really important matter to stress on) (:

p/s : i just got a call for interview. omg. should i go? i guess i have to right? shit. but its not at the same place as Suhaili. :/ i guess im on my own.

be nice.

2010-02-17T03:50:00.000-08:00

today was too productive, i slept my way through. from 5pm to 7pm. wvvonderful. now you see the maternal side of me. i woke up as early as 8am, despite turning in really late the night before(i swear i cant sleep). i cleaned the mess in my room (yes, terrible mess) as soon as im done gulping down half a cup of milo. you know, im that weak, i cant do anything heavy unless, ive had something for breakfast.

im uber satisfied. my room looks cleaner now, hang & dry the clothes(is that how you explain sidai kain? haha), vaccuum the whole house. wow, impressive indeed. hehe. there's nothing wrong with being proud of myself, right? i mean i dont get to do this often. so lets enlighten my mum's workload this holiday, might as well. (:

alright, Sufi is free to talk on the phone(SO FAST?! usually he calls it a day at 1030pm.) but its all fine. i was waiting for his call, nevertheless. :D that's how my night ends every day. with his voice. no less(:

up or down?

2010-02-16T03:06:00.000-08:00

come Year 2, i will try to socialise more. be it with the malays, chinese, indians. ALL RACES, its non-limited. ive been too cooped up in my own world all this year. and that is bad. very bad. its on the top of the list. lets keep on track.

not being able to get in Touch, is very much disappointing. not that i was kicked out or not chosen, i just didnt go for the next training. me being me, was afraid of being mocked at for my low stamina. i mean, i have to agree. i really do have low, really very low stamina. i swear. & its wholly pathetic. i was the worst out of the worst during the trial. i cant even catch or fling a ball. IT IS THAT BAD. i ran, jump, fall flat on the the ground, the slowest. omg, i can go on & on about how bad my night was w/o ending. really. that's how very kental i was. -.-

i will try to lose weight. (if i have the chance to) God, this is hard & super unpredictable. i can stay on chart the first day, and totally disregard the next. i must stay consistent. this is the most important. have you ever experience having lots of successful plans layout the night before, so excited to accomplish it, but totally lose the idea the next day. frustrating much? yes.

i need to categorise my room items. this could come second, since im on holiday and free for most of the time, till maybe i start working(which im all charge up for). heh.

i need words of support & encouragement. im weak and a sucker when it comes to accomplishing different objectives align. yes, its a weakness. so wish me luck.

p/s : boo, im missing you already.

p/p/s : valentine's day update will come up soon. (tmr?)

AWWWWWH!

2010-02-15T05:02:00.000-08:00

Sufi introduced me to the 70s show which was hell funny. and in the quiet, he actually watched Jon & Kate Plus 8(my favourite show). oh my. so cute. he watched, & he smiled(we are webcamming). he said, the kids are so cute and stuff. your smile. is cute-r.

awwh. we dont always share the same interest you know. ive always tried to adapt to his, well except some hardcore songs. haha. but awwwh. thats so cuteeeee.

why today, bff?

2010-02-13T19:18:00.000-08:00

the Day is finally here,

BUT,

My 'bestfriend' just had to ruin it.

IT SERIOUS FCKING HURTS LAAAA!

(it has never hurt this bad before)

p/s : sorry Dear, if i'd be throwing tantrums, keeping silent.

my tummy really hurts. that bad)':

silly, Love.

2010-02-13T02:33:00.000-08:00

when youre in love, you are happy. its just an essential feature the heart will feel. you know there's no tomorrow without him. you wake up to a brand new day everyday, knowing the one you love is there, somewhere, thinking about you all at the same time. you smile, you grin, as if the time spent in life has all its worth. its the best feeling. and all you hope for is, no disappointment at the end of the day. you keep your hope that high. you circumstance your actions to the peak. if it means, eloping, you would. then love becomes silly. you do things you never thought you would. no love is not silly. you are. the things you do for love, makes you look like one. but then again, you do it all for love. you dont find yourself insane. its all in the name of love. for your own happiness. you'd do it. you're hooked. and find yourself happy sacrificing anything for love. then you're in love. but hey, keep yourself to the limit. do not fall too deep. else, you need that last few ounce of your energy, to back it all up.

be deeply in love, not greedy.

p/s : i cant wait for tomorrow, pumpkin(:

dangerous wands.

2010-02-12T06:07:00.000-08:00

haha. yes, thats my boyfriend. he sent me this vid to spice up my night, during revising. you know how dreadful reading notes after notes are, so here it is. he knew just anything for me to out a smile. he knew how much i love Harry Potter. even this afternoon, he makes a decision to watch 'Percy Jackson & The Lightning Thief' - a movie directed by Chris Columbus. he directed the first two Harry Potter films. (and for all you know, his movies are all good). so yes, i have no idea how Sufi got to know this movie was real good and thought i would like it(cos there's magicky elements involved in it, i guess), but unfortunately for us, there wasnt any suitable time slot available fr the movie.

despite being tight in cash, and myself warning him over and time again that i am seriously tighttighttight in cash, he went ahead purchasing tickets for the 'Little Big Soldier' movie. and none did i know, the chinese medieval movie starring Jackie Chan and Wang Leehom(He's hot. hehehe) was hilarious and interesting all at the same time. really. its worth my Baby's money. heh. awwh thank you Love, for everything. the food, the comb(HAHA), the bus ticket, the movie tickets... everything. thank you :D

on a different note. its a huge relief cos ... EXAMS ARE FINALLY OVERRRRR! :D yeah man! all UTs were manageable alhamdulillah. well except Maths. its always maths aint it? tho its better than the previous one, im just hoping for the best. really.

i guess thats all for the night. i need to sleep in, and dream for hourssss. i had enough sleepless nights to start with. will update tmr, if possible aye. goodnight. & oh, i really miss my girls.

hmm.

2010-02-04T04:02:00.000-08:00

studying for UT3 is draining me dry. the thought of having to rely on my laptop solely for notes werent helping either. easy distraction is just one way lead to my doom hole.

(Anwar Ibrahim's sodomy trial is absolutely disgusting. i dislike him in the first place, and will stood by my stand all ahead. he has that attitude my whole family werent in favour of. the victim, Saiful has even swore upon the Quran, what is there to go against with. swearing upon Allah's holy book is not some child's play. this is serious matter when you're extremely certain you're innocent. lets wait till tomorrow for the trial statementin court(which jsyk, has been postponed 20 times). someone has been reading the news(:

why does 17 year old girls in Singapore looks like 23? yes im jealous. im high in jealousy. maybe because of my height, unkept hair and the extra fats on my cheeks which somehow makes me look younger. they looked more mature(which im so not sure if it does apply in em' brains too). i dont know. and whats the rush, one day ill reach that maturity age too, enjoy my teenagehood to the fullest cos time wont chase after me.

now now, what should i wear for school tomorrow. i need something new, something that is able to successfully triggers me to get my lazy ass to school. seriously. since there's always nothing to look forward to in RP, i need new clothes for me to wear. it will help. trust me. then comes the money part. do not talk about it. better yet, stop thinking Fini.

then ill be disfunctional. because i cant think. this is the ironic of having to challenge your own mind. you'll come to a point where you need to comfort yourself. things will get lopsided, and you want to balance it out. is this in the nature of every human being or is it just me?

p/s ; cant wait for 14th Feb. finally new pictures, will fill up this page. and its gonna be an awesome. our plans will work. right Love?

not confirmed.

2010-02-02T04:46:00.000-08:00

"Baby listen. i let you work cos i want you to have the experience wise. for the money part, you know youll always have me to back you up whenever we're out. i want you to experience the working life, and you must very well know how to manage your time. spare time for us too. im telling you now, working life is not easy baby, you must know how to handle customers, cannot cry cry okay. you understand me?"

-Sufi.

awwwwh like seriously? hee. he knows im a very sensitive little lady. cannot kene marah sikit, or i'll mess up. haha. but thank you for being supportive Baby. i love you. and ... I WANT GONG GONG PLEASEEEE!

pissed.

2010-01-27T22:05:00.000-08:00

Sufi is out there somewhere in the almost thick 'forest' shooting his 'enemies', and at the same time, overlooking Woodlands region. he is able to see RP from far but of course not the tiny miniatures in it. oh what luck. and the thought that im unable to see-through the forest IF i were to board 161, sucks even more. he is so near, yet so far. ):

Nard is in school i assume. received a text from here this morning about ____. but girl, i hope my advice were being heed upon. ive went through the same 'heartbreaking' situation. youll feel uneasy and such. but do not mislead yourself. have faith. have trust. thats all you need. put your awry perspectives and doubts aside. everything will be just fine. im sure.

Humai. youre one unpredictable woman. a closed book, alike Nard. haha. im still suspicious about ____. spill the beans, babe. nothing to hide(:

im about to start a debate with Team 1 now. we're the opposition. totally hopeless. i aint good with words(which i dont think Sufi will agree :P) i hope the notes taken down do me justice. i mean, please. do me good. dont add up to the misery of distancing with Sufi and my girls.

FUCK. no i didnt debate. whaaaaaafuck!

Currently, reading Tavi's blog to fill up time. she has interesting fashion values, and i have yet bring forth an interest in vintage and couture. im still leaping. still striving towards the climax.

coincidence.

2010-01-26T18:31:00.000-08:00

"Your stubborn will is not going to bode well when it comes to love today, Virgo. Some tension may arise in your matters of the heart and you will need to keep your temper in check. If you are attached, you can make your point without beating it over the head, so address tensions with love if you don't want to overburden someone. Better yet, leave the tough discussions until tomorrow. Single? It is possible that anything said other than exactly the way you like will set you off today. Try not to take too much notice to passing comments, and let your response wait for another day."

-Daily Horoscope.
it sure did happen this morning, but remember... coincidence.
[edited]
am chatting online with the 2 new moms. haha. they cant stop me from laughing. complaining about how they cant fit in the baju kurung anymore. paused the convo to attend to the babies. haha. its okay, Hairis Rafeqi and Rifqy Azriel, auntie will come to you next Sat(cos your mums forced me to, its suppose to be on Sunday) and bite your chubby cheeks. no i shall be a nice auntie, i will give crazy smooches alright babies. auntie loves you two<3.
[edited/]

i wanna be in San Francisco.

2010-01-25T21:47:00.000-08:00

despite having overloaded+more than enough sleep last night, i fell asleep again in class this morning. hehehe. i seriously need to do something about it. while others have trouble with sleeps, i have otherwise, which is so not good.

let's try this - tonight, as soon as i reach home, i'll stay awake throughout, i will not have my power nap(come to think of it, its not so 'power' as what they call it to be, cos im referring to 2 to 3 hours of sleep here), i will rest & watch Jon & Kate Plus 8(my all time favourite reality show :D) and stay up/study till Sufi calls for our usual night convo, and the remnants hours to the next morning would be reserved for my much-needed sleep(: sounds like a good idea. ill update about this tmr? no promises aye.

anways, just to clear the air. no one hit me, they hurt me. not by physical force. the medical reason for the 'bursts' was due to my excessive cryings. its heartbreaking, but then again, i can only point myself for faults. and this person can neither be my boyfriend nor anyone closest to me. they dont lay a hand on me. not ever. their overwhelming affection of love controls their actions towards me. so nuff' said. its my mistake to publish something confidential in this official website by the way, cant blame them. whats done is done.

*heave deep sigh

anyways, Nard's birthday was a B L A S T. :D no pictures, cos i need to 'steal' them from her poly mates. hehe. sorry guys, nevertheless, thanks for inviting and yes, we made it a success. and Mai, apologies for leaving you alone, i bet i can find no other (besides Nard) who can go through all the troubles with me just for one's bliss.

dont give me shit, girl.

2010-01-24T18:11:00.000-08:00

i love my Family.

i love my Boyfriend.

i love my Girls.

what more can i ask for?

awwh.

2010-01-17T04:41:00.000-08:00

F - "i love you, Baby?"

S - "hmm, sounds more like youre asking a question aint it, Baby?"

F - "nooo, of course i dont mean it tht way. awwh you dont like it, Love?"

S - "if its not how i thought it is, then its fine(: i love you, too Baby?"

F - "awwh thats so cute. i love you honey. *tiny smoochy kisses."

AWWH HOW CUTE IS THAT? (:

2010-01-16T04:19:00.001-08:00

please give me the chance to have it. to own it. to call it mine. ive yearned it for the longest time and you know it. im not being selfish. im just being diligent. if i dont get it now, i wont get it, ever. i promise to start saving for 2 months and repay all the bucks ive forked out. you may not agree with my decision. but my mind is settled. im gonna get it. fullstop.

jaddd jadddd.

2010-01-13T20:44:00.000-08:00

MamboStatic says:
*saper tu?
*aku tanye saper ajar..

FYNNIE. says:
*BALA.

MamboStatic says:
*bala maner pulak yg kau kenal nie
*balakrihnan per?

FYNNIE. says:
*bala security guard simei.
*then dier tukar jadi bouncer psl besar sgt.
*which aku npk kat vivo ngn bini dier.

MamboStatic says:
*tk muat ehlk?

FYNNIE. says:
*lawa jugak.

MamboStatic says:
*ehk

FYNNIE. says:
*boleh tahan eh si gemok tu.

MamboStatic says:
*haha
*dier pakai susuk tu
*susuk pengasih
*dier gemok..
*tapi dier kalau jampi kat tu pompuan... pompuan tu nmpk dier mcm shah rukh khan
*wakakakakakakakakakakakakaka

FYNNIE. says:
*hahahahaha.
*ade ade je kau
*berdosa tau,
*jgn say like that la.
*ckp uh mcm kublai khan.
*KUBLAI KHAN SAPA SIAAAAA?

MamboStatic says:
*aku rembat kau!!
*kublai khan tu dari crite ahamad albab da

FYNNIE. says:
*AKU REMBAT KAU LAGI KUAT!
*KUBLAI KHAN TU WARRIOR DULU2 AKU BLAJA HISTORY.

2010-01-13T18:17:00.000-08:00

today. im willing to take the challenge. i dare myself to work hard. stop stoning. stop side tracking. stop running out of class when the faci said 'go'. finish up the 'worksheet' questions on time. FOCUS. listen when the faci is ~~cockking~~. FOCUS. concentrate. look at the big screen, not MY laptop screen. FOCUS. question or answer faci when asked. FOCUS!

yeah. need to change. i hibernate in class, did you know? i daydream alot. like countless. like every single moment. and stop. look around. and start daydreaming again. and i heard day dreaming is bad. im sure it is. i might gonna stop that too.

throughout this whole 2 weeks after new year, have i carried out atleast A 2010 resolution? let me see. no wait, i cant see a thing, cos ive yet to write down my 'new' year resolutions even. what a noob. 'if you fail to plan, you plan to fail.' have you heard of that saying? as cliche as it already is, i manage to believe in it. well, its true aint it. im gonna start noting it down and applying them in my daily life. maybe ill tell you soon?

i have been disappointed in myself for awhile now, till this freaking day. before i started RP, i promised myself to join a sporty CCA since im in the sport oriented course. since i havent had the chance to. i would love to be in one. i might not have that very much interest in sports. but till now, i havent find myself in any. its either im not a good sportwoman, i have no stamina, or many other reasons that shall not be told. there are always things thats stopping me. i might just gonna agree with Sufi and a few of my mates, to call myself a 'loser'. i chose to let things stop me. i chose to surrender and surpasses it. not much of a winner i thought i am. and thats when paranoia comes in. i need to stop being paranoid, at all times. optimist is the word.

am i too free? i thought i told myself to FOCUS? just so you know, if there's no updates here, do check my tumblr, cos its possibly updated every day. thanks guys(:

mushy post

2010-01-09T06:52:00.000-08:00

listening to : Only One - Yellowcard.

first, let bring me your vision to this post's title. its gonna be real mushy. for those who can handle it, can stay reading. those who dont, you're allowed to click the red cross button. thank you. (no pun intended).

im not really sure what im feeling now. but i sure do know, nothing overwhelms happiness right this moment. guess im slightly disappointed thats all. but ive expected it to be, so what? ive expect worst, even. i know i can not handle it, but i still went straight to it. so why the qualms? i know whats gonna happen then, so why complain now? why this feeling? plus, its been years ago. in fact FOUR FREAKING years ago, asshole. why cant i just shut the fuck up. afterall, i intend it. no one else. even you told me to stop & dont go ahead if i cant get a grip with it. its over Fini, get it over and done with.

dear Baby,

i love you so much. i cant run from the fact that im all over you. my headstrong, never failed to get me feeling worst, each time. thank you for trusting me with your words. after giving me the pass to read your past(posts dated year 2005). your infatuation for someone else. i felt... like i was floating. something like.. sorry i dont know. it seems like you took so long to forget her. and this heart shrinks.

then it came to the posts where you were writing about me, anonymously. one word - 'wow'. i didnt read your archives that far, so i didnt know what you were thinking at that point of time. i didnt know you posted about me, whats with even 'liking' me. it makes me feel so much better. how you got really hurt, when i was 'confused'. how you stood by me, with that neutral expression. and all along i knew nothing about how you feel. i must be blind. oh, i was all along. you were right in front of me. but i see through you. and obliviously breaking your heart. but you stood still. you knew you had the chance to back off many times, but you kept on going for your luck. i knew it wasnt easy for you, cos for sure, you never aimed for another heart ache. and you waited..

till one day i realised how much you mean to me. how i got crazy when you didnt text or call for a day. i guess that was a test? but it sure does kill. i made a decision, i'd choose you over anyone else. cos in you, i see sincerity, honesty, care and Love. and i know, that decision wasnt rash. how you were willing to wait. your tolerancy over my childish attitudes. you have all that i want in a partner. life partner. and since then, i never had any issues to stay. i knew i made the perfect decision all along. my heart beats for you. my mind longs for you. thats just how much i love you.

sorry if i'd trouble you with continuous dumb questions. how much i pressed on to get you to give me your permission. i love it when you absolutely knew how i would react and get hurt if i were to know things i dont exactly yearned for. i love it whenever you ensured me, that im your one and only right now, no one else gets in the way.

three words to express what exactly im feeling right now.

i love you, Sufi Hizrian.

2010-01-07T04:13:00.000-08:00

RJ : done.
Tumblr update : done.
Almost passed out during Maths UT : done.
Laughing hilariousl with CE mates : done :D
Dinner : done.
Usual night convo with Sufi : not done.

i hope he does well in the parade. anyways, i just wanna say, i had so much fun after school today. why, you may ask? i met my CE mates, namely Rab, Shaz, Razin & Man(!). its been long since i last had that LOL, especially in RP. they made RP almost similar as when im in Simei. really. they never change. with em' endless jokes. i had lots of fun. i really did. do come again tmr aye, funny mates.

oh! i cant wait for Saturday too! :D i told Baby to come over to RP's Open House as soon as he book out because, i wanna show him around. ("haha! jalan dlm sekolah sendiri pon tak tahu :P") who knows after he's done serving the nation, he might join me in that school too(but of course, i might already be graduating right after he enters). im sure everything's gonna be fine. and fun, of course! who knows, history might repeat itself :D

[edited]

why this inferiority?

why this insecurity?

why this paranoia?

[edited/]

2010-01-03T20:15:00.001-08:00

i am super duper sleepy.
just finish up a big chunk of chicken cutlet (all by myself!)
i can just throw the thoughts of forming the 'perfect' shape.
its entrepreneurship mod, bores me to no end.
all about financial accounting, plus submission of business plan. (SWOT is pretty easy, i didnt knowww-.-)
i hate numbers. especially the use of Excel.
lets just keep Excel for maths aye. be nice(:
even so, you would never find me doing Excel.
i groan at the name Excel.
approx 3 more hours to end.
i wanna go home straight & sleep.
YES SLEEP! oh God, the thought of it. i need sleep so bad.
why?
i woke up several times when the alarm blasted off at 4am, woke Sufi up but the alarm kept on snoozing which of course disturbs me.
what can make it worst with the dready cool weather?
i am very grouchy.
but ive packed my bag so well last night, now that does brightens me up a lil.
i find myself real good at organizing, i am still feeling proud. feel me?
what more can i ask?
first day of school, new bag, new watch, new outfit, well packed bag :D
BUT!
Gary knew where i bought my top from & he told the whole class. nbcb. haha.
oh! just remembered ; tmr's web & new media UT2.
ill study real hard when i get back.
i THINK i did pretty well for the past 3 UT mods. *whispers.
hehehe. dont action. nnt result hancur, malu sendiri. ada betol?
OKAY DAH!
eh wait...
"Baby come back fast! dont go around shooting haiwan haiwan terbiar dekat err hutan tu? you at hutan meh now? no right? i dont know lah. but take care okay! jangan balik lambat!"
OKAY DAH! :D

last moments of 2009.

2009-12-31T04:34:00.000-08:00

sometimes we fall in an abyss, too deep. we found no hope getting up & make things right. but why the impulse allegations? should you alter the impossibilities to something thats worth putting your bullet sweats into. as cliche as it is, thats one of the many aspects on how life goes. amend things, get it right, & you'll find your future waiting at the perfect climax with a smile, which in turn will get you one. (:

-yours truly.

hey ya'll. guess what? ive got my presario backkkk! well, of course. that totally sums up this chirpy post aint it? :D and its no longer flickering, there's no more line on the underneath tab line. everything's just so clear. it feels like i just bought a new lappy. hehehe. HP even gave me free christmas gift. HAHA. its just a laptop cover. but its nice. shuddup. im up for free gifts, anyone? haha. im broke, noobs. hell broke. even Baby has to 'feed' me now. HAHA. i told you, if its food that i consume, he'll do anything for it. sacrificing his last cents, which sometimes makes it look wholly worthless. because.. i'm choosy/picky/fussy. all of them. im sure he wont agree with "or's".

i bought a sugar doughnut this morning, while travelling to Alexandra to collect my presario. but i didnt finish it. its just ONE doughnut. i could have just shove it in my throat. but Fini always has issues with 'food'. -.- i gave him a pathetic look & complained, if i were to eat more, i might throw up. i know, so dramatic yada yada. but i seriously hate it!

i know what you readers are thinking, - how can anyone stand me? exactly my point, i have absolutely no idea. but somehow, this whole silly thing does distinguish some goodyness in our relationship. he is there for me every single time. i repeat - each and every one of it. i know how impossible for me to get through him when he's out of town & all that sort, but we settled on one thing. if there's an argument, talk it out, & try to keep things smooth, in a day. we dont need any time more than 24 hours. thats how we got here. contents of the year 2009? i have no qualms on any days this year.

i think i wont ever be able to get used to having 'fun' in school. i dont know. i have no cliques. im used to being alone. i find it easy & fast. my classmates are a nice bunch though. we still have that constant laugh & jokes, every day. but.. i dont know alright. keep it simple, in school - i keep myself shut. i only went crazy during times like, 'yay, im meeting Baby tmr.' or 'i miss my girls, im gonna make plans'. well & thats just about it. & this is to my CE mates;

"hey guys, im sorry i wasnt able to attend Shaz's birthday bash. you know how things are, but i still miss every single one of you. i really do. i appreciate your efforts in slipping me in with all the get-togethers. oh & Happy Birthday Shazni Amjad. :D im still older than you(:"

& there's the girls. the beautiful ladies. my all time favourites. Mai Nard Suhaili & Natasyah(yes babe, i still remember you. & i miss you so much too). my pillars of strength. the ones who successfully shine out the rays from my butt. the ones who kept me giggling on the streets/school/anywhere(!) with em' awfully awkward jokes. those who will be there, even when distance does matters but never did get it in their way. cos, the bond in friendships never changes, alike the end which is inevitable.

did i just summarise my 2009 memoirs?

to :

2009-12-25T05:17:00.000-08:00

you readers,

i apologise, i havent been updating my space daily, even it is my holidays right now. but just to let you know, i wont be blogging till i get hold of my presario again. yes, my lappy has been sent for service. didnt i tell you its has been giving me eyesight problems cos the screen just cant stop flickering.

anyway, thank God for warranty. hehe. im hell broke.

wait up readers(:

love,
fini.

moolah..

2009-12-22T19:30:00.000-08:00

today is all about getting it right.

right after im done with this, i have to clean the house. no, my room especially, its been such a mess. and im talking about big mess here. then, ill be leaving the house to meet mum at Amk Central, hopefully to purchase Starhub Home Hubbing Pack. it will be a good buy, i assume. then, ill be bringing along my previous lappy to have it fixed or sold. (depending if 'they' wanna buy it, which i hope they will) i told my mum i wouldnt ask her for school shopping money if they buy it. hehe.

i have to make it up to Baby for last night. as many happy posts of us were being published here, we do have our downs too. lets just say, we're just like any other normal couples. it can get a lil too harsh sometimes, but we love one another all the same. we'll try our best to make changes and end the argument as soon as possible. but with real lessons learnt.

as ive told you, its all about getting it right.

p/s : posts and pictures of my latest occasions will be updated soon(:

Sunshines.

2009-12-17T19:00:00.000-08:00

finally my regular period is back. its a huge relief. no, dont take it as if ive done 'something' atrociously wrong. im just worried sick that my health is unacceptionally 'unhealthy'. i could be sick or has infected some disease that causes my irregular flow. howells, how more paranoid can i be? shouldnt i be thankful to God for relieving my worries. Alhamdulillah(:

The Casual Meet-Up with my girls was - Spectacular. as per usual, nothing changes. well.. cept' a few. Nard and myself saw a few changes in Mai. she's getting 'cuter'. hehe. but is still as loud as ever. the common question of the day from the girls was - "Babe, muka aku action tak kalau macam gini?". HAHA! i had no choice but to say 'Yes', cos i need to be truthful for my part too. they were not as what most would call it "kecil hati". they wanted a truthful answer too. that's my girls, they dont take it to heart. and that's what friends are for.

First up, initial meeting time - 130pm. exceeded like there's nothing new, we finally met at 230pm. HAHA! thats like an hour late. but lets conclude like there's no one to blame aye. afterall, we are certain that inevitable joy and fun will eventually happen. we travelled all the way to Bugis to get my stuffs. i bought two dresses. hehe. Shopping is easy with these two girls, they provide the best suggestions and comments.

after very much of "aku seriously lapar!", we quickly make our way to Lucky Plaza's Ayam Penyet Ria. its been long since the closing of Novena's outlet. had our individual cravings, along with revelation of our absolute new secrets which we reserved till yesterday. haha. we have that strong grip to keep these secrets to ourselves till we finally meet. we dont spit it out even if we were to be talking on the phone. we find it more 'appropriate' releasing the tension, personally.

we then move our heavy butts to Wisma - for Nard's shopping pleasure. but it turns out that i was the one on spree. i bought a 'cloudy' jeggings from my favourite shop. haha, those who really knows me, will understand this. & im proud my girls did. they left me alone in the shop while they waited outside. heeee(: Nard bought a pretty top from F21.

soon, with Mai's "aku da malas ah nak jalan-jalan", which we all agreed. we stopped by Wheelock's Starbucks, where we switched places countable times. -.- Nard especially placed her eyes upon sofa seats ONLY. so that explains the switching. when we finally got ourselves settled down, we ordered drinks and talked about more stuffs. but i wasnt really in the convo, cos i was arguing otp with Baby. but everything's fine now, we are back to our lovey-dovey selfs. hehe. thats how we are, besides the fact that we dont argue all the time(:

we walked a lil bit more, and off home. i love my outings with the girls, every single time. we hope to do this often. well girls, this Saturday? is it ON? Abang Sufi da nak belanja. HAHAHA.

2009-12-17T00:19:00.000-08:00

i cheered myself up at the thought of, giggling with my neighbour's
philippino baby when i saw him sticking out his head out the window this
morning. when i passed, he would look at me with a cute fat cheek smile on his
face and greeted me with an almost silent 'hello'. i smiled so widely and
returned his greetings by offering my hand to see if he shakes it. and well,
that intelligent (maybe 2 year old) boy warmly did. he babbled and babbled.
hehe. its really adorable. i told him i had to go. i waved a 'bye' and he
watched me off. a small bubbly stranger who makes my day(:

2009-12-13T22:57:00.000-08:00

lose bun + chubby cheeks + real eyelashes

"i might wanna do something tonight"

i so...

2009-12-13T19:45:00.000-08:00

i so cant be bothered with maths. neither has maths been good to me. so bleah. me & maths just dont go along. and dont even mention the word 'well', cos we have a an invisible center intermediary which makes us repel in extreme force. anyway, i just did a perfect messy bun to my hair. seriously, its an accomplishment cos, my 'buns' can never get messy, ever, even if i tried. i know, how ironic. but seriously. i have a fetish for lose messy buns, its sexy. and, as contradicting as it is, im not calling myself sexy either. haha. though it might sound like i just did. its on a 'jfyi' note(:

i so cant wait for Wednesday and Saturday. ill be out with the girls and my favourite boy, relatively. its been such a long time since i last met Mai & Nard for a major catch-up. thanks Nard for 'planning' the meet up(: everyone are individually busy. and i dislike the fact that we have been 'distancing'. i wonder if thats the right word, but its definitely not a good one. again, i hope this Wednesday, we'll retrieve and relive everything that we've lost(:

i think 'sleeptalking' is funny. i dont sleeptalk but i cant possibly say i never did cos just the other day Baby said i was. HAHAHA! i thought he was lying, but i can never be more right cos he came up with proves.

i woke up at 6 in the morning without receiving any calls from him the night before. i told him to call me whenever he's heading back. so, i got furious and called him which surprisingly, he answered! NOTE: HE ANSWERED MY CALL AT 6AM WHEN HE'S OUT OF CAMP, THAT IS SUPERRRRRRRRRR RARE. (oh & i just realise i used lots of 'rare' in a few of my previous posts-.-) so anyways, the conversation went like this...

me: why didnt you call me last night? you promised.

him: i did and you answered.

me: huh? err no. i was asleep the whole time.

him: haha. you did. go check yr call list.

me: oh err yeah, what did i say on the phone?!

him: you went "okay.... okay.... bye". i havent even said bye. i was still talking.

me: omg. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

i seriously find it super funny because, again, I RARELY SLEEPTALKED. no one ever told me i did. and at the same time, i never would know if i did, but i know i didnt! maybe i was too tired. i sleeptalking might be funny, but Sufi's sleeptaking is hell funnier! SUMPAH. hahahaha!

me: so are we going out this saturday?

him: yeah we are.

me: okay..

(silence...)

him: eh kenape you ade kat situ?

me: huh??

him: err *giggle. nothing.

i knew he was sleepy, but i insisted chatting otp longer. haha! later, he told me he was sleeptalking/dreaming. i dont know. he said, he 'saw' me above his bunk cupboard. HAHAHAHAHA! he sleeptalked more than me. and right after he did, he wouldll usually giggle, got really embarrased and he refuse to talk. i would make it worst, by teasing him endlessly. oh what a nice girlfriend i am... NOT!

and and, i think my photography skills is AWESOMEEEEE! hahaha. let me show you a few of my masterpieces.

POWER GEDEBAKKK! HAHAHAHAHA!

2009-12-13T04:45:00.000-08:00

a quick update before i go on a mad revising on entrepreneurship mod. -.- today, me & family attended my 'nephew's' wedding at CCK. considering dad's side consist of more girls than boys, so when a man is about to go up the dais, its kind of special. kakaks even pulled me to join them to go over to the girl's side. which i RARELY joined in. the girl's side has lots of entry 'barrier's'. but it was okay, overall. oh God, i need to get lots of things done! ive got to get ready for school(oh damn at the thought of everyday outfits..), ive got to finish up revising before Sufi calls. wait, i can do it, i get myself organised really well. im gonna get everything done, on time. and to my ladies, wednesday outing ON! :D

picture of the day.

the rest of the pictures at Multiply.

2009-12-10T17:03:00.000-08:00

Early this morning, i was complimented by a reknowned sarcastic Faci that i am a 'good reader'. so should i live the day showing gratitude or well, remain selfless in today's non-tgif lesson. no, i should continue to be a good girl, from yesterday. cos im proud to say that i was a helpful daughter at home when mum was out to send uncle to the hospital. oh damn, again that dreadful place. never mind travelling, or staying over with uncle, but ive promised myself i will be there with my uncle, no matter what. for those who dont know, im that close to my uncle. really tight bond. i hope he'll be fine, and please dont make him stay longer, he gets bored easily, he'll do whatever it takes to go for a puff, and he's afraid of being alone. i hope there is really nothing wrong with him, InsyaAllah.

i dread to present. because i just cant stay still, i fidget alot.
it worries me that Marketing UT is not done yet, i dont think i did a good job revising last night.
i am so worn off. whats with the cramps AND something called 'presentation'.
im hungry, but will only have my fill when i reach hospital. i miss ttsh's yong tau foo, (although for sure, anywhere else's ytf are nothing compared to Simei's [:)
i am going to stay at ttsh till night, and alone. hmm...

oh well. thats about it. i need to revise on Marketing again. URGHHHHH! se-te-resssss!

friends? i apologise truly.

2009-12-07T23:27:00.000-08:00

my mind is not in class, hence i wasnt paying my full attention on entrepreneurship module, throughout. i have many things nesting in my head. apart from missing Baby more than usual, i miss my friends, namely Humai, Nard & Soya. yes, surprisingly Soya is in the list. just the other day i dreamt of all three. to the 3 of you, i apologise i have been missing out, i've been a little cooped up in my own world. as you know, my life in these recent days, is a total reverse from before. and trust me, IT SUCKS BIG TIME! i want my freedom i use to own, the freedom i use to grip.

i hate the fact that i NEED and DID to follow everyone's suit but they cant follow mine.
i hate the fact i have to depend on so many rules.
i hate the fact that people are just being unfair.
i hate the fact that i can never have my final say now.
i hate the fact that my way of life has changed!

i just wanna be alone. but when the right time comes, i need Baby, my girlfriends to be there and hear me rant. i weeped myself to sleep last night, i wanna be alone but at the same time, i need to talk to someone too.

i hate this. i hate this. i hate this.

a new edition to the family.

2009-12-06T18:10:00.000-08:00

just the other day your mummy showed me her ball of a tummy.

just the other she showed me those awful stretch marks.

just the other she placed my hand on her tummy to feel your movement.

just the other day your mummy said, "ill make him call you Auntie Fini, & your bf Uncle Sufi"

just the other day she walked around with heavy breathes, even when it was such a short dist.

just the other day she told me, you're her next biggest responsibility.

now,

welcome to the world

Muhammad Hairiz Rafeqi Bin Haidir!

make sure you'll call me 'Auntie' and not 'bibik' like your elder cousins Danni & Aqiil okay!

if not, ill bite your chubby cheeks.

cant wait to see you:D

congratulations Kak Yana & Abang Hai!

oh, one more little one on the way.

a few more days to go Kak Wynn & Abang Azhar.

quick! so i can buy 2 in 1 present!

HAHA NOT!

suddenly i feel so old. that's nothing new actually, i have over a hundred nephews & nieces under my 'wings'. you two december babies are the special add-ons to the family.

what's more can i ask for?

All Praises To Allah(:

3 inch platforms.

2009-12-06T03:02:00.000-08:00

a fine class date indeed. i wasnt dressed classy neither did we have lunch @ classy restaurant even after much planning.

i left home early to fetch him from home. sometimes, its nice being nice(: we travelled all the way over to Marina Square right after to have lunch @ Seoul Garden. told you its not worth the money if i were to dine in there, ever. but then again, i desperately craved for cockles. & Sufi, forever following my suit if its about food that i consume, gave in. learning from past experiences dining in SG, i only grabbed small portions of each servings. i did. i had four rounds of grabbing dry plates altogether. but well of course, Baby had more. we had a fully cooked feast. if its not for my guidance(:

we left for Ion Orchard. like finally. since its been officially open, i have yet to step a foot in that beautiful architectured building. & i finally did, but decided not to walk around too much because there's just too many shops! i almost went crazy. ALMOST. but, i didnt have that much money with me to go on a spree. so i embraced, & kept my hands to myself. though i felt regretful not getting that knee length Uni Qlo dress): & if i had that much cash with me ytd, i would have bought Baby that handsome jacket. hefty price, but its absolutely charming. well no doubt, he looked even more gorgeous in it(: the toilet is awesome i must say. its prettayyy. i can spend hours beautifying my face. yes, it has that soothy feeling.

i didnt wanna stay any longer, forcing myself through the crowd, so i told Baby we should go somewhere. furthermore, my foot was hurting. i wore platforms, because apparently mum misplaced my 'original' footwear for the day which was the other mondo gold beaded pumps which havent been worn just yet. that kinda brought me down a lil. but with the company of my favourite boy, all was better, always.

so we made our way to Cineleisure to get his favourite doughnuts of all time. we were being approached by a friendly surveyor & whats the survey about? - cramps. PERIOD CRAMPS. she said we can exchange the pads for goodie bags. i disturbed Baby when the girl handed him the pack of 'regular wings' which he had to hold it. haha! though he looked uneasy, Sufi being the sporting boyfriend as always, makes me happy. he didnt upset me. he even joined in to share his thoughts in which the question was "why are you happy when you have cramps?". so obviously that question totally wasnt related to him even in the tiniest way, his answer to the question. "im able to give my girlfriend all the care, concern and love when she most needs it." awwwh. *draws heart shape. haha! the girl directeds us to the booth for the exchange of goody bags. i went in alone, hoping to get 2 bags, because i have two answers, but only left the booth with one. haha. someone was disappointed. he missed out a packet of pringles, herbal essence conditioner and.. girl's shaver. HAHA!

we entered Cine in search of our usual delicious donuts. i picked out Honey Glazed, which is MY all time favourite. and two more packs of 3 mini donuts each to go along. i forced my way to the cashier to pay first. and the one who served us, was this really cute lil girl, who has the perfect customer service etiquette. haha, really! she was good. it was a family business by the way. & they served us well(:

then off we made our to our secret hideout, just the two of us. and one word. 'lovely'(:

picture of the day.

rest of the pictures @ multiply.

today. at 5.15 pm.

Baby came over and i sneaked out to meet him at my place. NOT HOUSE-.- haha. he's really sweet. he came all the way over from his house in Sengkang just to spend 15mins with me before he left for camp. that is bad. him booking in, is always bad. its always not a nice feeling. & what makes it worst, he's leaving for field camp tmr, for 4 days! whats new? ):

when im wrapped up tightly in your arms, & you speaked softly,

"take good care of yourself okay love?"

my heart feels like its been 'squeezed'. my heart cries.

the more steps you take, further away from me,

the more i want you here, just right here.

2009-12-02T17:21:00.000-08:00

MY MUM IS HELL CUTE, I TELL YOU.

alright, so first. i need to say my mum doesnt text neither did she know how to.

so if youve followed what ive tweeted. someone i know is actually selling me her dslr at 700. by which when i told mum, she said "why never say your budget 500 sekali?"-.-

so i TRIED texting her...

'ibu, if 500 can?'

10 minutes later... (TEN!)

'ok. pakal duit fini'

no fullstop no nothing. 'PAKAL?!' SOME MORE! hahahaha. bloody hell. i thought she asked my brother to reply me. but when i called to reassure, she said it was her. I LOL-ED!!! & she laughed at herself too.

"were you the one who replied me just now?"

"ya. what? cannot ah? ibu pon nk try try."

"HAHAHAHAHA! WAH PIANG IBU. ADIK TERKEKEK SIA DLM CLASS!"

"hahahahaha!"

"kk, you pay 200 then i 300 kay?"

"no, you nk sangat you pay all."

"ah laa ah laa. kk bye bye".

BLOODY HELL! FUNNY OR WHAT SIAAAA! SERIOUSLY THE MOST EPIC MOMENT OF THE DAY! HAHAHAHAHAH!

me being me, him being him, us being us.

2009-11-28T02:10:00.000-08:00

apologies for the lack of updates, everyone.

random things i will work hard for;

grow tall-er. (based on my aspiration....)
have slimmer arms & thighs.
do magical adjustments to my hair.
score remarkable grades for the next two UTs. (promised mum)
buy a polaroid camera/canon powershot. (i heard powershot has almost the same functions as DSLR, hmm...)
get my room sparkle clean.
sentosa beach & sheesha next week w Baby(:
shop. i need more pretty clothes. im having wardrobe malfunction every now & then.
spend more time with Baby. & Girlfriends(:

anyway, this is a belated updated for last week. Baby and I had our usual alternate saturdays dates. call it kental, well i just have to agree. well thats just a policy for me to obediently abide. sometimes, i wish im older. & Baby will go, "we will be in time to come(: patience pays, remember?(:" & he makes it all worth waiting.

our initial well-planned rollerblading session over @ Pasir Ris Beach followed by an afternoon movie date. yes, we planned to have an afternoon movie showtime cos we wanted to catch paranormal activity. night time would be inappropriate, cos im very kental like that. but Fini being Fini, as fickle minded as she is, she changed the whole plan to having a proper day out in Town. heh. Baby was a minute furious cos we've planned the list out the whole week but had to change it to follow my suit. how irony. im sorry Love.

so straight on with our plan. ive been meaning to step foot in Ion Orchard, but us being us, we'll always sidetrack. first up; late lunch. well yet again. we planned to have lunch at places we've never been to before, but ended up @ Puncak again cos we cant hold on to our growling tummies any longer. heehee. i ordered Sweet & Sour Fish w Nasi Ayam whilst Baby had Claypot Rice(suggested by me, hehheh.)

soon after, i dragged Baby to help me with my search for formal clothing. i had to admit it was a fabulous find, with really 'down to earth' prices. call me sengket, i dont really mind. comfort is all that matters(: Baby didnt mind waiting for me to change & all, he was already helpful enough, choosing for the right ones. (especially those that's not showing too much or too revealing. haaa.) i bought the whole outfit (including a pair of cute beady complete with a black ribbon which is the most comfortable footwear among all) @ at reasonable $50. hehe!

then i went on a crazy shoes spree. MONDO! oh hell yes. Baby admitted feeling uneasy looking at me grabbing shoes, one after another for fitting. yes, im crazy for shoes! i bought two pairs. a pair of platform and gold studded pumps. hehe SUKE! :D

Baby dragged me out of FEP, & we walked over to Cine to get donuts. his crazy cravings for oreo donuts especially. & i gagged at his cutesy smile when he placed his sight on them. we bought half a dozen & sneakily chose a seat in Gloria Jeans. err no? we bought cookies & cream to go along. i have to emphasize it was my treat! :D yes, im proud of it. treating him is a rarity, cos its usually a wholly reverse. we sat around, snap pretty pictures(which i fell in love almost instantly), Wifi-ed to book for movie seats. then we travelled back to AMK Hub in a cab to catch PA. we were given discounts for the tickets cos the guy who served us is a schoolmate of mine. (we're in opposite classes.)

i need to confess - i hate Paranormal Activity. i regret watching it. because up till now, which is already a week later from last week, i've had mum to sleep with me every night. i tried sleeping alone back again & hogging otp with Baby the whole night like usual but to no avail. those eery images, esp the last part, kept haunting me. call me scaredy cat, well yes i freaked out. i had Baby's arm all to myself throughout the whole show. he covered my eyes during the scariest scenes, he just knew when to. But it was also an easy observance that Baby was terrified too. haha!

then we rushed over to Bishan J8 to get my high-waisted skirt(+ a sleazy top...not!). Baby bought me the top, hehe. Thank You <3!>

Picture Of The Day.

rest of the pictures @ multiply.

2009-11-25T21:29:00.000-08:00

im highhhhh & haaaaappyyyyyy because there's a high chance im meeting Baby today. even if its gonna last for wee while, at least i will get to see him right in front of me. you see my point.

"sambil menyelam minum air(:"

hehehehehehe. :D

why?

2009-11-22T21:27:00.000-08:00

on text message.

me: baby? i know everyone knows/recognise you, tho you dont know them. but take note, that im the only one who truly loves you okay hon?

him: haha! awwh. thats what i wanna hear. and thats so true. you know, i didnt expect it to be that way, but it doesnt matter to me cause i only love you too(:

well yeah, apparently i have people coming up to me & asked if Sufi was from ITE Simei, sports management, because he seems so familiar. & it makes me wonder "why everyone knows him, but not me, im from that school too):". haha! what a dweeb. well its okay. its just a random but meaningful confession i need him to know.

im excited for tmrrrrr!

2009-11-19T21:51:00.000-08:00

whats in my mind right now? :

"BAIKK AHHH! SCRIBES NO NEED TO PRESENT! WOOHOOO! :D".

haha! call me the lucky one. love you faci! hahaha. but seriously, its maths today. & i didnt do a single thing. hahaha. im highhhh. my friends confessed its their first time seeing me this wayyyy. hahahhaa. but im seriously mad crazy. & they dont know the real reason why... :D

baby baby baby baby baby...

WE'RE ON TV!

2009-11-19T03:19:00.000-08:00

yes! laugh all you want. but this was what i caught on tv earlier today. from the kids show K.I.T. hahaha. bloody hell. there's myself, shida, nard & humai in it. we looked very... minahzxz cutezxzx. hahahaha! sorry, but i was practically giggling behind the camera. mum too! thank me for this. hahaha. ive caught this on camera for the.. THIRD TIME ALREADY! -.- anyways, just so you know, we havent been paid please. HAHA!

anonymous readers.

2009-11-17T04:53:00.000-08:00

trust me, its nice to know that i have anonymous readers. its interesting like that. somehow, they encourage me to blog more. so yeah. i hope they liked what i blogged by the way(:

Sufi's stucked in the lecture room, in camp. his cute whiny msgs got me all smiling down here. anyway, he's been 'appointed' the machine gunner. err yeah, i have no idea how to explain what exactly he has to do as the MC. so err yeah. :/ i heard Rizal is one too? should i say congrats to you two? haha. i seriously dont know. wait, can you see the significant similarity between this two? haha yes! both are tall and big. well, what are SM(sports management) graduates for right? haha.

anyways, since i have lots of spare time right now, let me update really belated outings with Sufi. (sorry, i think its funny calling him Ian in written, so lets stick with 'Sufi'/Baby yeah?)

last week, i cant remember the exact date/day. sorry! i wrote too many apologies, dont you think? Baby and I went to town. after so long. yes, we've been 'out of town' lately. cos we preferred to go to places we've never been to. i told you, didnt i?

we went allllll theeee waaaaayyy to Jurong first to get Baby's army stuffs. i knowww, whenever he's out, he has to get his army stuffs. he always lack things for the army. we went to the Chevrons. the place was somewhat like Safra in my opinion, seriously. now i know where baby got me the err army fbt shorts from. yes, ive been wearing guys' shorts. is comfortable the right word? right after, his friend came along, with his gf. everyone does seem to bring along their gfs. both Baby & his friend bought their needed items, soon Baby's friend who's driving sent us back to Jurong East mrt. heee, thanks!

we were clueless to which train we really need to board. we were practically running to & fro choosing the right train which will bring us to RIGHT route. both of us were very contradicting. i kept telling him the train on platform A is the right one, and he said otherwise. when i left him to decide the route(cos i know i can depend on him for this, anytime), the RIGHT train left. so 5mins of our precious time got wasted, till the next one arrives. tsk!

we spent 40mins in the train, talking, laughing.. well, that would be me of course. cos i talk alot whenever im with him.

him: *smile.
me: why you never talk? am i talking too much? i mean, i have to. its a way i express my misses to you.
him: awwwwhh.. okayyyyy *wide smile.

sometimes, when i ask questions, i will answer them myself. lebih baik tk payah tanye kan-.- but he doesnt mind, so yeah(: so we alighted at Orchard, & i suggested we go for our late lunch first! so we went to Puncak, where i had my long time food craving - honeydew chicken noodle(extra gravy!) and baby's - fried rice with salted fish. delish.

soon, we walked around Far East in search for my belt(which i bought in less than 5mins). then we went to Taka basement to buy donuts. and and and, i swear i wont buy donuts from this shop again because, in simple words - it is so not nice. not my type one. the dough is very, err... oh God, how do i explain this. i seriously have no idea to explain it, but one thing for sure, i wont buy them again. Baby wasnt happy because, i bought quite a few(which i initially wanted to pay, but he paid them before i could fork out my money) & they went to waste. no he's not complaining that ive wasted his money or whatsoever, he never does. he was just err 'pissed' cos im always wasting my food. but i really wanted to vomit! i swear he's seen the look on my face when i force myself to finish up at least A donut. it was that badddd.

so Baby bought me cheese hotdogs, to err replenish the awful donut which i just stuff myself with. surprisingly, i can finish it within minutes. hehe. cerewet ah this one. so we sat along the steps outside Taka, people-watch, bump into his ex-workmate who asked if he's changed girlfriend cos she said i look different? err yeah.

then, we went over to Orchard Central to meet his old friend and his gf. as soon as we reach OC, we actually bump into them at the Apple store. what a coincidence. i dont talk to people, cos i shy. haha! so i just smiled at his friends. they were nice(: all his friends are. he got lots of friends by the way. sini stop, sana stop. everywhere also stop cos always got his friend one.

did you know OC has a rooftop? haha. sorry. we vehh slow one ahh. we went to the rooftop and walked around. nothing much actually. but i think OC's rooftop is gonna be the new Esplanade's rooftop. you get me? ahhh yes. as usual took pictures, like tourists.

finally, off we went to Plaza Sing. i LOVE walking to Plaza Sing. i dont know. its just romantic. haha! nvm. shouldnt elaborate further. no no wait, its just fun, walking hand in hand you know. no we didnt walk. WE MARCHED. i swear. he taught me how to march. & i followed, & i realised i know how to, & im vehh happy. haha!

soon after we reach, we went to Fila store & got myself a bag. and seaweeds from Daiso. SEAWEEDS! :D 2dollars only, big pack somemore, damn nice!

lastly, its time for home. we took the bus. but before that,a funny incident happen. we were pathetically broke. like really. we have no cents left, even. so we prayed so hard our ez-link cards will work. haha! thank God it did, but that could only last us till amk bus interchange. so we had to walk home. hehe!

ATTENTION : sorry, blogger is not allowing me to upload my pictures here. so ill upload it in my multiply. sorry for the inconvenience. click on the link, on the right box alright?

2009-11-16T17:47:00.000-08:00

audreyhepburncomplex.tumblr.

i actually didnt went down on first break, which is like ... now-.- this is so cooool. (love game - lady gaga is playing in the background-.-). sidetrack: lady gaga's 'bad romance' is awesome shit. seriously. anyways, had 2 sausage sandwhiches packed by mum. thanks mum<3.

im actually saving my money. planning to save $60 this week. so i wont have to bug mum for money. i think im kinda independent like that. heee. ive saved $30 so far. 30 more to go. i know i can do this. but sad thing is, i have only $6 left to last for the next 3 days. now that is so uncool. i need to endure. i should stop pampering myself. DISCIPLINE!

prolly having grooming later at 6. hopefully i could be home by 9, latest. chop chop. im sleepy ttmxm. i swear. i could just sleep right here, right now, no doubt. but im being sweet to my faci, cos she's sweet to me. haha. oh God, cant you see how bored i am.

its cold in this room. has it been raining this morning? is that the reason why i wasnt awake when the alarm rang? (my faci just sighed.) i wish im at home, specifically on my bed, cuddled up in a ball, with Mr Smiley right in my chest, silky silhoutte right over me. oh my bliss.

okay, back to second meeting. wish me luck. (my friend has been asking real lame riddles to the class, even my faci is laughing. its lame but funny. haha!) at least there's something to keep me awake :P

cracked lips.

2009-11-15T20:06:00.000-08:00

LOOK MAI! IM WEARING THE SHIRT YOU BOUGHT FOR ME! :D (not in the picture: the watch, and nard's bandung keychain.[but i brought them to school!]) see. i value presents! :D can i have more? haha. oh, Mr Smiley is at home. i cant bring him to school. sorry B! :P

"then forever it will, sugarette"

2009-11-15T04:28:00.000-08:00

thank you humai for the pretty sourvenirs! :D i am still wearing the watch right now, and already planning to wear the shirt tmr. see how much i love your presents, sweety. also to nard, who ive been missing so much, you know i love you too pretty. :D

on another note, Baby & i had a real heaty argument today. real - heaty. but little did i know, that boy came up with a surprise to perk me up. he felt real bad, he claimed. well, me too baby. really):

i was in my room, when i receive a call from him to get my seventeen magazine at my doorstep. i did as i was told, & look what ive found.

along with this, came this real big "mr smiley" pillow...

and a tatty bear card. (with cute adorable writings, & word of apologies)

no doubt, i was smiling so widely, my dry lips almost cracked(!) :p , he was shyly(?) peeking out from across the street.

i had my mistakes too. God i felt so bad): im really sorry B. anyway, everything's going fine now, alhamdulillah.

i love you sweet thing(:

em' khaki green things.

2009-11-12T19:45:00.000-08:00

sorry ive been missing out for quite a while. been busy with stuffs, been busy with my own 'absences'. (: anyway, last week has treated me really well. and i thank God for that.

oh but first and foremost, i wanna congratulate Sufi Hizrian for passing off officially as a guardsman and earning that khaki beret. all thanks to your very own effort dear. you know you can do it, & you earn it well. congrats again Love(: im sorry i wasnt able to attend the ceremony. i will try to make it if there's a next time okay?

anyways, for he has made it through those vigorous regimes in the army, he was finally given 6 days 'holiday'. the ever precious free days ive been waiting for a very long time. and everything that we've planned has run successfully, and i repeat, each and everyone of it.

i met him all 6 days. LIKE FINALLY. that 6 Days wouldnt be possible if he didnt make it through. so yes, alhamdulillah(: he booked out on thursday night, after the ceremony which his parents attended. its cute when he told me how his parents reacted when they saw him on the ground. im sure they were really really proud of him for pulling it through(:

day 1. - veryvery belated birthday and 1st anniversary celebration/picnic @ pasir ris beach.

we met up as early at 730am. God, i felt so bad. the tired look on his face. yes, he needed more sleep but i insisted that we should meet, ive been waiting for that friday since like... forever! yes, im that baddd. but i really felt sorry): he didnt seem to complain, at all. but i did. i asked him several times, "are you bored?", "why you never talk?", "you sick eh?". now ask me, "you stupid or whaaaat? cant you see his tired?!" damn, how more stupid can i get?! seriously. gosh! I AM REALLY SORRY DEAR): but we had fun afterall right b?

first we went over to Whitesand's Fairprice to buy the stuffs. we got everything for less than $35. so thats good. see, picnic doesnt need lots of money. :D a good date tip.

the usual place we sat.

he was the one who brought along all the neccessities needed, eg; the mat, cutleries.. that was suppose to be a girl's job! shame on me.

i did the marinating though.

he puts up the fire, and look. girls, if you ever wanna go for a picnic, BRING SOMEONE WHO'S VERY ENTHU TO START THE FIRE. if not, no fire, no bbq. its really wasnt easy to light up the flame okay?

the stuffs that i brought along, for entertainment.

before & after.

soon, it started to drizzle, and we had to rush over to a shelter. right after we were done with all that tiring shifting, the rain stops. waaaah best. so we just sat under the shelter, too tired to move please. shelter = beside toilet. NO, ITS NOT DIRTY AT ALL. cos they just built it? -.- reallyyyyyyyy!

we had our very own feast, but it was such a waste that we didnt bring along chilli sauce. i can never finish up my food without chilli sauce. grr. as a result, we werent able to finish up our food(cos of one picky girl who will never finish up her food without chilli sauce). again, sorry Baby. ):

when the time strikes 4, we left for home. what a wonderful day. yes, this post may be short, but actually there's more to just sitting down, burning our food, and us covered with bbq smell. im glad we made it. now, i can finally strike this off in my 'important days' list.

updates on the rest of the days will come up soon(: wait up readers.

super random.

2009-11-12T16:50:00.000-08:00

i wanna go johor uh please uh. serious punyaaa. but really la. kan mcm best gitu. like getaway to oversea country. naik bus 170 ke, kalau tak, singapore johor express ke. see, dah buat research lagi. murah tau. satu trip less than $3 only. cheap kan. but now, passport ibu simpan. how to curi-curi take? if go there, everything pon murah. change $50 singapore pon da boleh jadi kaya there. i think eh, if klua ard morning, balik ard petang pon baik eh. haha! weak uh ade curfew. tapi, asalkan sampai there can already uh. shopping sikit, makan... beli presents utk keluarga. confirm they like. tapi bila bawak balik beg plastic malaysia, they see, confirm they scold. so how now? i tell Sufi also he say cannot, why? "later anything happen dkt sane siape responsible?" ahhh. of course he ah responsible. but nothing will happen one what. he tall, confirm he protect one. HAHA! so tak link. serious ah super bored. niari maths, everytime maths, gone case. orang all semangat nak solve, im here talking nonsense. after school got maths UT lagi, belajar smlm also sikit only. 30 mins up, then sleep sampai pagi. how can like this?! bila mau upgrade sister! aiyoh. apa mau jadi? (kenape semua bbl pasal maths, tak boring ke friends?)

why am i even talking like this?!

I SWEAR I DAMN BORED.

stoked. [edited/]

2009-11-02T04:07:00.000-08:00

lets make this a brief one.

today was all about FUN FUN FUN & more FUN! :D
met Baby at 730am. off to woodlands...
bugis. bugis junction. seoul garden. splendid spread(:
spotted transexuals outside Topman. do they shop at Topman? and i must say, they own bigger boobs than i do. of course diorg punye fake laaa. tsk!
all time favourite garlic chicken, seafood(basically, just prawns for me), usual spaghetti, cept this time w tomato sauce, chicken bolognaisse unavailable, some snacks . Baby had almost every thing. he eats a lot, & i thank God for that.
its a waste to bring me to seoul garden because, 1) im very picky. 2) i only eat food that im familiar with. 3) im not a good taste-r. 4) i go for one round of serving only-.-
its really nice to have someone who cares more about you, than themselves. Baby, picked up all the cooked food for me, while i lay & spread them out neatly. im afraid of the sparks(!) i freaked out when oil spill drops on my hand. (so cannot kahwin kay like this-.-)
my very own creation, brownie with ice cream. i know i know. but non-brilliant people wont think of something like that. haha KIDDING. even baby questions me about my creation(:
i asked him, "see, clever not?" , he answered, "genius. (:".
i am feeling very mother-mother + wife-wife + gf gf. so i cooked maggi tom yam for Baby. basically, just adding maggi mee into our soup of the day. but thing is, I SERVED IT ON HIS PLATE ITSELF. awwh. i dont usually do that you know, but i think im gonna make it a start. it feels so damn nice. especially when he goes. "awwh, thank you dear" every single time. i feel so appreciated(:
[edited/] Baby asked if i wna play arcade, specifically DAYTONA. definitely reminisced our first date playing that car racing game just to kill time. hehe. BUT! i lost him by mere ONE SECOND! ONE! he took over me at the very last second, how was that even possible?!
so Fini was very upset. she showed a sad(pathetic?) face all along. her almost possible glory to boast to Sufi, became impossible, cos it vanished in just 1 second. she frowned. Sufi cheered her up by playing the 'basketball game' together. he went "awwh, thats my girl" whenever she scored goals. and she's all chirpy again. :D [edited/]
strolled around a lil more, took 133 loop-bus.
Baby slept on my shoulder thruout the journey. this is a rarity. because, he's too tall and usually, he can never be able reach my low shoulders. but he tried to make himself comfortable, & was able to lay his head comfortably. its a nice feeling, looking at him sleeping in serenity right before me(:
but it wasnt really that easy to wake him up :P.
sent me home as per usual(:
he got home, & we webcammed for a lil while, before he gets ready to leave for camp.
our chat page always ends with " ): " (sad faces).

so he's back in camp. more "):". and i am suppose to be revising. thank God, ive literally studied for cognitive mod tmr. so itll just be mere - revising. and prolly, s-t-u-d-y TWO 6P for marketing mod. both has over 20 slides-.- tell me about it.

all in all, what a lovely day it is. all the better, with the chilly weather.